Dallas Nitpicker Central (Reborn)

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "The first time you step out of line with her, Sue Ellen will be a very attractive widow." - Bobby warning JR to stay out of Pam's business.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Toss-up between Jack and Ellie.

After the guy in the shower sees the confused look on her face and asks Pam what the matter is, she shuts the door and heads back to the bedroom. He heads out to follow her and she tells him about her season-long dream. The guy confirms that he really is Bobby Ewing and they got engaged yesterday.

JR's over at Mandy's place and they discuss the dismal future of the oil industry. JR resolves to do something about it and calls Sly to arrange a meeting of all his field managers for 11 AM that morning. Mandy reminds him that Sue Ellen's still at Southfork and he hasn't kept his promise to her. JR reminds her that his wife's been drinking heavily and it won't be long before she's out of the picture.

Cliff has a meeting with an advisor about slumping profits from the sale of oil from Gold Canyon 340. Cliff insists on keeping the tract going because it's Barnes-Wentworth's major source of revenue. Jamie suggests that all of the independent oil companies should lobby the government to put hefty tariffs on imported oil but Cliff pooh-poohs the idea.

JR's meeting with his managers and tells them that any well pumping less than 12 barrels a day is to be shut down. The managers point out that it will be expensive to reopen them in the future but JR says it costs more to keep them going. They all wish they could drop an atomic bomb somewhere in the Middle East and end the crisis.

Ray and Clayton do some beer-guzzling and talking and Ray says he'd like to start his own business...maybe raising cutting horses. He wants Clayton to go in with him and the older man wonders if this has anything to do with his separation from Donna...or her pregnancy. Ray says that it's so he can leave a legacy to his child. Clayton and Ellie later join Ray at a cattle auction and they agree to the partnership.

Pam tells Cliff about her engagement at work the next day. Cliff predictably goes ballistic and can't believe it. Pam says she's going to continue working at Barnes-Wentworth and her remarriage will have nothing to do with their relationship. Cliff meets with Marilee and Jordan Lee to take action against the oil problem and passes off Jamie's plan to lobby the government off as his own. Jamie just stands by and watches incredulously.

Bobby tells JR about his plans to remarry Pam to JR's utter disbelief. Bobby warns him in no uncertain terms that his union is not to meddled with like it was before. He goes over to Pam's place later and tells her that Jenna and Charlie are devastated by the new development.

Cliff gathers together the independent oil men and outlines 'his' plan. Jack tells JR he thinks Ewing Oil should get behind the plan and JR tells him to know his role and shut his mouth. JR tells Bobby he thinks they need to get rid of Jack. Jack and a date have dinner with Cliff and Jamie and tells Jamie she should invite Jack over sometime because he could be a potential ally in the fight against JR. Jamie gets upset at Cliff for stealing her idea but Cliff says that her idea was dumb and it would never work.

Later, JR and Donna discuss things and he tells her that Cliff's idea would work if someone like her would get behind it and use her political connections for everyone's good. Donna is reluctant but JR says it would be the best thing for her right now. Sue Ellen returns home and trades barbs with JR about Pam's impending return to Southfork.

Jenna makes preparations to leave Southfork and JR tries to dissuade her, telling her to keep up hope that Bobby will change his mind. Jenna says she's beyond hope.

A huge explosion wracks an oil well at Ewing 12. Bobby immediately heads over to check it out and learns that the fire was probably deliberately set by a disgruntled ex-worker. Eventually, the fire is put out and Bobby tells the foreman that the field will have to be shut down because of budget cuts - and because he doesn't want to give the bomber another target.

Ray and Clayton interview prospective employees for their upcoming venture. One of the guys, Wes Parmalee, looks a lot like Ben Stivers, so he gets hired. Wes comments that he likes the feel of Southfork.

Mandy meets up with Sue Ellen downtown and they have another argument about JR. They both expect each other to be the one dumped shortly. That night, Sue Ellen tells JR she's realized that the problems in their relationship have been mostly her fault and puts on a slinky negligee to try and make up with him. She says that she's remembered that no other man has turned her on the way he does. She comments that it's been a long time...and JR agrees. Once JR starts to get interested, Sue Ellen immediately backs off and tells him he'll never get what he wants from her again. She also says her hate for him has given her the strength to stop drinking, too. JR, of course, doesn't believe that and leaves a bottle of vodka in her room. She promptly returns it, saying that he must have dropped it by accident.

The oil men have another meeting and JR asks for the floor, which he grudgingly gets. He says that Cliff's idea is a good one but they need a professional lobbyist to do their work, and he suggests Donna Krebbs, to Cliff's amazement. Donna is brought in, to a standing ovation.

Ray helps Jenna and Charlie move in to their new home. Well, he helps Jenna while Charlie just sits around and comments that she hates her new house and is going to be a total pain in the butt from now on. Sue Ellen gets a private investigator to follow JR and Mandy and report on their doings together. JR and Mandy have dinner at Scalini's restaurant and discuss the continued delay of their plans. JR says he's still just waiting for Sue Ellen to make one mistake and then she'll be off the ranch for good.

That night, Wes Parmalee settles in to his room at Southfork. He gazes longingly at one particular picture which kind of resembles a young Eleanor Southworth.

Episode 225: Pari per Sue Aired: Mon, Dec. 21

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  ".. you can't see the family from the outsiders!" - JR calling it as he sees it around the dinner table.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Jenna. Unfortunately not for long.

Bobby gets a visit from the field boss from Midland who begs him to come to his field personally to check it out before the final decision to shut it down. He also gets a call from Jeremy Wendell who says he wants to meet for lunch. He and JR do meet with him, and Wendell says he'd like them to consider selling Ewing Oil to him. Both brothers flatly refuse his offer.

Cliff meets with Donna about preparations for their lobbying in Washington to find that she's already done most of the work.

Ellie and Sue Ellen talk in the exercise room and they discuss her plans to give up drinking - and stay away from what triggers her binges. She resolves not to let JR make her feel like a loser anymore.

A very tackily dressed Mandy Winger is nearly hit by a turning car, but is saved by Sue Ellen's private investigator. She heads to a mall for some shopping and is disturbed to find that the guy's following her. The next day, she calls JR from a parking lot and tells him she's very frightened. She tells JR about her stalker and JR just assures her that the guy is probably just a creep who likes to follow beautiful women.

Ray stops by Jenna's place to see how she's doing. She invites him to come over for dinner but Ray says that Miss Ellie has planned a special dinner for Pam's return to the family. At the dinner, Ray is bothered by news of Donna's success with the oil men. JR and Jack discuss the purchase of his share of Ewing Oil and Jack says he'd like to hang on to it just to bother JR. During dinner, JR comments that the family has become somewhat watered down with outsiders again. After dinner, JR tells Jack that he's not really a Ewing and shouldn't feel welcome at Southfork for much longer. He also gets Harry McSween to look into Jack's past.

Cliff has a little 'ouble-tray with his enis-pay' and Jamie notices they haven't knocked boots since he lost the court battle with JR. Cliff says that the problem started with their marriage.

Bobby heads out to Midland and sees how tough times are in the oil-producing towns. The field boss points out that people are hurting - and that's why a well at Ewing 12 was blown up. Bobby returns to the office and debates the issue with JR, who says he's not interested in paying people for doing nothing and if Bobby really wants to do the world a favor, he should find a way to raise the price of oil.

Wes Parmalee finds Ray doing some target practice and finds that Wes is a crack shot. Wes wonders why Ray isn't living at Southfork with the rest of his brothers. Ray claims he's made to feel like an outsider and isn't really interested in the big business of Ewing Oil, unlike Jock's other sons. Wes assures him that Jock Ewing was probably just as proud of him as he was of JR or Bobby.

Sue Ellen gets a mail catalogue from Valentine's Lingerie, to JR's disgust. He says that no self-respecting woman would ever be caught dead posing for one of those magazines. It seems to give Sue Ellen an idea...she visits Valentine's Lingerie later that day and finds the owner there. She says she would like to buy 90% of his business for $ 50,000 - way more than it's worth. She says he can keep 10% of it as incentive to become her silent partner and follow her lead.

Jack meets with Cliff and Jamie and finds a sympathetic ear with his brother-in-law. Cliff counsels him not to accept JR's offer to sell out, but rather to sell to him, with the promise that he'll make JR's life a living hell. Jack just says he's not interested in selling right now - but if he does, Cliff will get the first crack.

Ray finds Donna working busily at Southfork and they chat. They rehash the old argument about the different lifestyles they're accustomed to. Ray says he's certain that she's not interested in his success - only hers. He says he needs someone to be there for him when he needs it - and has decided she's not the one.

JR determines to do something about falling oil prices and meets with a retired army General who shares his views. The General confirms that an elite group of commandos could find their way into some Arab territories and strategically take out some oil-producing fields and equipment - but it would be risky.

Episode 226: Once and Future King  Aired: Tue, Dec. 22

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Let me guess...mattresses." - Sue Ellen to JR about what Mandy is modeling this week. 

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Clayton continues to garner a following for that Lifetime Achievement award.

JR further investigates the possibility of taking a drastic step to remedy the oil crisis and drops a name with a friend - BD Calhoun. The friend says that BD can take care of the problem but it will take a lot of cash.

Another lobby rally occurs, during which Donna and Cliff debate how much money it's going to take to get things accomplished. Donna gets frustrated and tells Cliff that maybe he should run the thing if he wants, but Bobby intervenes and says he'll fund Donna himself if he has to but he's certain that she's the right one for the job.

Pam visits Jenna, who's busy cleaning her windows. Pam tries to make peace between them but Jenna's still bitter and says that she still loves Bobby and can't deal with the thought of her being with him. Pam gets a dirty look from Charlie on her way out, too. Ray comes over for dinner to find that Charlie's going out of her way to let Jenna know that she's unhappy about everything since their move from Southfork. Ray tells Jenna about the very old days when he and Pam were going out - until he lost her to Bobby. They watch Charlie drive away with some guy on a motorcycle.

Cliff gets a visit from Jack, to whom he offers a check for $ 500,000, as an incentive to sell his share of Ewing Oil to him and not to one of the Ewings. Jack accepts the check. Jamie gets totally upset at Cliff's gesture, figuring that it'll be the first step in Jack leaving Dallas. She also hints that their marriage is nearly over.

Bobby finds Ray out by his new home and thanks him for helping Jenna get settled, since he wasn't able to. He says he'd like to help her out with some money but Ray assures him he can handle it. Wes Parmalee drives up and is introduced to Bobby, at whom he gives a faraway look.

JR takes Mandy shopping for a car and she happens to spot Sue Ellen's inept PI. JR confronts him about following Mandy but he claims he's just looking at cars. JR tells Mandy he'll take care of the guy later.

Sue Ellen talks to an advertising executive about a campaign to put Valentine's Lingerie on the map. She says she'd like to get some models who combine 'trash with class'. [NOTE: I'm struggling to keep from commenting further here.] Candidates are interviewed and Sue Ellen doesn't like any of the concepts she sees. She says that she wants a woman who gives the impression that she's nothing but a sex object, and she thinks she has just the woman...Mandy Winger.

Bobby comes to the office the next day to find a woman there waiting to see him. She says that her husband is the one who set the fire at Ewing 12 and he's to be arraigned tomorrow - likely to be sent to jail for life. She asks Bobby for help, to his utter shock. Mrs. Scottfield tells him that his recent layoff from the oil fields drove him to get drunk and now he feels nothing but remorse after he turned himself in. She asks Bobby to come and talk to her husband, and Pam convinces him to do it.

Wes comes to Southfork to drop off some bills [deja vu all over again] and starts looking at some pictures before talking to Ellie, who says she has the strange feeling that they've met. Wes says he just has that kind of face.

The next day, Sue Ellen finds JR having lunch alone and wonders where Mandy is. JR says she's being interviewed for a big modeling job and they trade jabs over her.

Donna tells Ray she's heading to Washington for a while to start her lobbying and hopes he'll wish her luck. Ray says he'll do that if she really acted like his wife. Donna says she can't let her world come to an end just to be his companion.

Bobby comes out to Midland the next day to find Mrs. Scottfield waiting for him. They learn from a correctional facility worker that her husband hung himself before his trial.

That day, as JR and Mandy leave a restaurant, Harry McSween and his boys grab their stalker and they question him. JR is able to quickly determine that Sue Ellen's behind the whole thing. He tells the guy to stay away from them.

Ellie heads out into the fields in search of Clayton and is told he's probably at Wes Parmalee's place. Ellie goes over there and is shocked to find a belt buckle with the letters 'JE' on it, a very ornately carved penknife which she recognizes, and some of the letters that she wrote to Jock in South America. Wes arrives a few minutes later and Ellie hysterically asks him how he got them. Wes says that they belong to him - always have. Ellie is absolutely horrified at the implication...

Episode 227: Enigma  Aired: Wed, Dec. 23

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  The whole JR/Sue Ellen exchange at the beginning of this episode was great. It gave us zingers like:

"I liked you better when you were falling down drunk."

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Jenna, who stood out among many candidates.

Ellie gets totally upset at Wes's continued insistence that Jock's things 'belong' to him, and when he insists that he really is Jock Ewing she tells him to get off the ranch immediately. Later she looks through the things in Wes's desk and recognizes the old picture of her among them.

JR confronts Sue Ellen about the detective she hired and she insists that she never hired anyone. He says that they should end their sham of a marriage and divorce but she says she's not interested in any such thing. After he leaves, she thanks the PI for a job well done. JR tells Mandy about it and he figures Sue Ellen's trying to gather evidence for an upcoming custody battle. He suggests they keep a low profile for a while. Mandy calls her agent, says she's reconsidered, and would really like to audition to be the Valentine Girl. Mandy has her first photo shoot the next day for Valentine and Sue Ellen approvingly looks on from a dark corner.

Jordan Lee tells Cliff that one of their joint ventures is not going too well - they'll need to put in more money to keep it afloat. Cliff says his cash flow is bad right now and Jordan suggests that he should ask Pam for the money. He does ask her the next day and Pam says she'll have to think about it.

Ray comes by the next morning and tells everyone that Wes Parmalee seems to have moved out of his bunkhouse. Ellie asks Clayton what he knows about Parmalee and she is told that his references seemed legitimate. Clayton decides to sell his refineries because of falling oil prices and so he can spend more time with Ellie, who he can see is distracted by something. Ray meets up with another rancher who says that Parmalee came by his place looking for a job. 

Bobby suggests to JR that they might want to buy up some smaller independent oil companies and JR agrees that it might be a good idea. They visit Franklin Horner to establish a half billion dollar line of credit but he says that it would be impossible without collateral. The boys say they'll take their business elsewhere if Franklin can't help them. Later Franklin offers to do it if half of Ewing Oil is offered as collateral but Bobby angrily throws him out.

Donna calls Ray at home and Jenna picks up the phone. She explains that she was invited over to dinner with Charlie.

Ray calls Wes at his motel and they make arrangements to meet. Before Wes heads out, he rinses the brown colour out of his hair and beard. He tells Ray that he didn't want to leave - he had to, because of Miss Ellie. And if he wants to know more, he should ask her. Ray does ask her but finds that she's not willing to talk about it.

Mandy and JR have another night in during which she expresses discomfort at being a kept woman and waiting for Sue Ellen's departure from Southfork.

Sue Ellen tells Pam and Christopher she's glad they're moving back to Southfork. She also says things are better for her since she stopped drinking.

JR gets a tape of a documentary of some of BD Calhoun's work, rescuing hostages in the Middle East and leaving a lot of destruction behind. He's told that a meeting with BD has been arranged in Colorado for the next day at his private place.

Ellie has dinner with Punk Anderson and shows him some the things she found at Wes's place and tells him about Wes's claims of being Jock. Punk wonders whether Wes would be willing to make that claim to his face and they head over to his motel, where Parmalee greets Punk warmly and asks him to come in and relive memories of South America.

Episode 228: Trompe L'Oeil  Aired: Thu, Dec. 24

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Hello, Daddy." - JR to Parmalee before denouncing him as a fraud.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Cliff and Jenna are totally absent.

Wes tells Ellie and Punk the story of the his crash and his long recovery at a French missionary hospital, after a bout of total amnesia and plastic surgery because of his burns and injuries. Slowly, he says, his memory started to come back though he still has huge gaps...and the things in his duffle bag. He also says he learned a lot about what happened to the family, including Ellie's remarriage. As time went on, he felt that he needed to be near the family again.

Ellie angrily walks out of Wes's hotel room, still claiming that she doesn't believe anything he's saying. Wes claims he never would have said anything if she hadn't come prying in his room, but now that his secret is out, he'll make sure that everyone knows who he really is. Ellie just walks away and Wes tells Punk he's sorry for the shock he caused. Punk privately tells Ellie that Parmalee knows things about their time in South America that only he and Jock would know.

Sue Ellen's advertising campaign goes into full effect now that she's found the Valentine Girl.

JR is taken via helicopter to Calhoun's compound by some commandos in an army vehicle. On the way there, he sees some of Calhoun's men performing some very explosive target practice at various objects. Calhoun himself prefers to shoot at silhouettes of real people. JR is introduced and tells him that he's impressed at his take-charge attitude and tells him what he wants him to do: take out some of the major oil fields in the Middle East, and make it look like a terrorist attack. Calhoun invites him to take a two-mile walk back to his compound and stay the night to talk over their plan.

Ellie and Punk show the assembled family [minus JR] what she found in Parmalee's room. She also tells him she doesn't believe Wes's claims of being Jock, even though Punk admits that the things Ellie found were with Jock in the helicopter when it crashed. Bobby adamantly agrees with Ellie, despite what Punk says.

That night, Bobby and Ray separately head over to Wes's motel and bump into each other. They decide to confront Parmalee together. Bobby tells him he thinks he's a fraud and tells him to get out of town. Ray comments that he knows what Jock would do in this situation and plans to wait and see if Wes will do the same.

Donna returns to Southfork in a really nice limousine. Ray fills her in about recent goings-on. 

When JR returns to Dallas, he finds Wes Parmalee at a nearby ranch and tells him he agrees with Bobby that he's a liar. He says he's willing to pay him off to get out of Dallas. He is angrily told that Jock Ewing can't be scared off - or bought off. And he's here to stay. Bobby talks to Ellie about seeing Parmalee, and finds that she's beginning to believe that Wes could be Jock.

JR heads over to a tavern to unwind and overhears some guys ogling a newspaper ad lasciviously. He curiously glances at the picture and is shocked to see that it's one of the first Valentine ads featuring Mandy. He immediately goes over to Mandy's place and tells her that he's not happy about it - and her career is over. She says she'll stop as soon as he throws Sue Ellen off the ranch and gives her an engagement ring.

The next morning, Sue Ellen shows JR another picture of the Valentine Girl and asks for his opinion. She's surprised to hear that he doesn't consider lingerie models as trashy as he once did. JR tells Sly to find out who owns Valentine's and how much it will cost to buy it.

Wes returns to Southfork to talk to Clayton. They argue about things - primarily about Ellie. Clayton says in no uncertain terms that even he were Jock Ewing, he wouldn't step aside and lose the woman he loves. And he tells him to stay off the ranch for good.

Bobby talks to an independent oil man about buying his company. The man regrets having to divest himself of his life's work for 30 cents on the dollar, but is faced with no choice. Bobby tells JR he feels bad about the plight of the independent oil man.

Relaxing by a pool, Jack is disturbed by a familiar voice - his ex-wife April Stevens. They re-hash old marital spats and she says she's heard about his new-found wealth. Jack says she's not going to get any of it but April says she received a very favorable divorce settlement entitling her to half of his income for five years.

Parmalee comes to Ewing Oil to see JR and Bobby. He says he's decided to leave Dallas and doesn't want anything from them. As he turns to leave, JR confronts him again about being a fraud and walking away when the heat got too rough. Parmalee turns around and asks them how he could possibly know about the hunting trip they took to Louisiana, where they were ambushed and he was shot, and told JR to take care of his first wife Amanda [Episode 35]. He leaves the brothers standing there, perplexed.

Episode 229: Territorial Imperative  Aired: Fri, Dec. 25

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Have you been lacing your coffee already this morning?" - JR to Sue Ellen when she insinuates that Parmalee might actually be Jock Ewing.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Tough call. The Ramboski only had one scene.

Sue Ellen jeers at JR about the return of his 'daddy'. JR staunchly replies that Parmalee is not Jock Ewing - just a golddigger who's after Ewing Oil. Donna talks to Bobby about the difficulty she's having in Washington convincing politicians to impose tariffs on imported oil.

Jack tells Jamie about April's presence in Dallas, now that she's discovered about his new-found wealth. He also tells her about the divorce settlement in which he's being forced to give up half of everything. Pam decides to give Cliff the 2 million dollars he needs to keep Jordan Lee's project going, but says she's not going to be his personal banker anymore because he doesn't seem to care about anyone who can't help him out financially - including his wife.

Mr. Gordon tells JR that Calhoun is interested in his offer, and JR also asks him to investigate Wes Parmalee's background. He and JR visit Harve Smithfield to ask his advice about whether Parmalee could have a claim on the company. Harve says it's possible that if Parmalee can show evidence that he is Jock, he could be entitled to all of Jock's property, including Ewing Oil.

Valentine's Lingerie is a beehive of activity because of the major influx of orders. Sue Ellen shows him the latest Valentine Girl ad featuring Mandy. and tells Ozwald that things are just going to get bigger, so he better start planning. JR's mechanic also has a copy of the latest Valentine ad, which JR tears down before angrily driving away from the station. Sly tells JR she hasn't been able to find out about Valentine's management.

Cliff meets with Jordan Lee for lunch and gets totally upset at him because of Pam's sudden bitterness. Cliff suggests that Jordan buy him out but Jordan replies that he can't because he has similar cash-flow problems - perhaps Marilee will. Jordan swears he'll never do business with him again.

Jenna gets upset at Charlie's egregious amount of make-up and tells Ray that she's tired of fighting with her daughter and it's making her sick. Ray offers to move Darius to his own stable so the Wades could come over any time they want and not have to face the Ewings.

April Stevens strolls into Ewing Oil looking for Jack but finds JR instead. She claims to be an old friend, wanting to congratulate him on his new fortune. JR says that Jack's 10 percent is not worth as much as it used to be. JR advises her to counsel Jack to sell as soon as possible.

Ellie wanders out of the house to look at the stars or something and Wes Parmalee sneaks up behind her. He again rehashes his story and tells her that he's hurting so much since he saw her again and for the first time, actually positively tells her that he is Jock Ewing. He asks her to think about their second honeymoon at Punk Anderson's lodge. Ellie wonders how he could know that but Parmalee says he could never forget. Clayton interrupts their conversation and wants to throw Parmalee off the ranch but Ellie holds him back. Wes says that even though it's difficult, he understands how Ellie feels and forgives her for rejecting him.

Cliff finds April lounging by a pool [what is up with this pool thing?] and introduces himself as Jamie's husband. He asks her to sell him whatever piece of Ewing Oil she manages to get and he's willing to pay her handsomely up front. April casually puts his business card into her bikini bottom.

JR meets with BD Calhoun at their private box at Texas Stadium and BD outlines his plan, which involves using Bedouin tribes to get some of the equipment into the desert without suspicion. JR says he doesn't want be responsible for any American deaths and BD says he has nothing to worry about.

Bobby and Pam take Christopher to a burger joint and they spot Charlie with a mean-looking bunch of bikers. Bobby confronts her about it but she tells him to mind his own business. Bobby easily takes out the three semi-toughs and drags her away kicking and screaming. They take her home and find Jenna to be somewhat outraged at their interference.

Donna asks Ray why Jenna was at his house the other day. Ray says she has no right to ask him such a question. She asks him point-blank whether they're having an affair and Ray rightfully goes ballistic at her, inviting her to move back into his house and be his wife. She, of course, declines the invitation.

JR and Mandy go to Oil Baron's Club for dinner and she gets a lot of looks from her new admirers. Two goofs actually come up and ask her to autograph her latest picture until JR shoos them away.

Sue Ellen comes to visit Wes Parmalee at his hotel room and she wants to help him with money or anything else he needs. He says he's surprised that she's the first one to open up to him and she says that she's willing to help out anyone who can harass JR. To her surprise, Wes comments that she's changed a lot from the time when JR's aggravation would drive her to drink. He says that he appreciates her gesture but doesn't need money - he would like to see his grandson, though.

Jenna gets a call from her doctor asking her to come in tomorrow. She seems totally devastated by what the doctor has to say....

Episode 230: The Second Time Around  Aired: Mon, Dec. 28

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Good thing she didn't get here five minutes from now." - April to a dejected Cliff after Jamie catches the two getting intimate.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Surprise! Clayton had little to do. Sue Ellen comes a close second.

A telephoto lens takes some night snapshots of Wes Parmalee. JR, Bobby, and Mr. Gordon plan to use them to find out the straight goods abut Wes. Parmalee comes to John Ross's school and talks to him about having to leave Southfork. He asks the boy to tell Ellie he said hello. Sue Ellen tells Ellie about her visit to see Wes and her belief that he could actually be Jock, which gets the older woman totally upset.

Jenna comes over to Ray's place after her visit to the doctor. She's discovered that she's pregnant and still isn't sure what she's going to do - she can't even bring herself to tell Charlie. Ray promises to be there for her, no matter what. That afternoon, Jenna brings Charlie to Ray's place to ride Darius. She decides not to leave Braddock so as not to upset Charlie any further. Charlie overhears the conversation and at first assumes that it's Ray's child but Jenna reveals the truth. Charlie figures that Bobby will be forced to marry her mother now but Jenna says she doesn't plan to tell him - she doesn't want to use the baby as a weapon.

JR comes over to Mandy's place to find that she has a prior engagement for Valentine's. They have an argument about her involvement with the company and she reminds him that he's had every opportunity to solidify their relationship but has failed - she's beginning to doubt whether he's serious about her. JR comes to see Ozwald Valentine to try and buy the business out for however much he wants, but Valentine says he's not in a position to sell.

Jamie prepares to take Cliff out to dinner but he says that he still has a lot of calls to take so he tells her to take Jackie out instead. A few minutes later, April Stevens arrives to discuss the future of the oil business. He tries to buy her off cheaply but discovers that April has done her homework. April says she wants to become a little bit more friendly before they do business...just as Jamie returns and spots them kissing.

JR, Bobby, and Wes Parmalee all come together in Harve Smithfield's office. Harve says he plans to sue Parmalee for harassing the Ewing family if he doesn't stay away from them. Parmalee says he has every right to be with them because they're his family. Parmalee is asked to submit to a series of medical tests and agrees immediately. He says he would have suggested it himself but didn't because they might have figured he was up to something.

Preparations for Pam's bridal shower and the wedding begin. As he drops Pam off at Southfork, Bobby tells her he wants to go see Jenna to make amends with her. Charlie tells him that Jenna's gone to the doctor [again?] and gets upset at him for his perceived mistreatment of her mother and herself.

Jack helps Jamie prepare to move out of Cliff's place. Cliff comes home and apologizes to her, saying that if she wants to get an annulment, he won't stand in her way. Jamie and Jack both laugh off that idea and Jack is surprised that Cliff is still focused on their deal for ownership of his piece of Ewing Oil.

The wedding day dawns and Cliff arrives at the bash with April. Jack realizes that Cliff must have overheard their conversation the other day and is after April's half of his wealth. An argument predictably ensues and JR heads over to talk to the bunch. He learns that April is Jack's ex-wife. Donna meets up with Ray to find that his attitude towards their relationship hasn't changed.

Ellie's gleeful mood turns sour when she spots Wes Parmalee standing in Southfork Lane amongst the parked cars. She tells him to get lost but he says he's not going anywhere - their son is getting married. They debate the matter and Wes agrees to leave if she promises to meet him, alone, at another time. To get rid of him, Ellie agrees.

JR gets a call from BD Calhoun in Oklahoma who has prepared a small demonstration of his explosive plans for the Saudi oil fields. JR is pleased that things are looking up.

JR and Ray help Bobby prepare for the wedding and JR even admits that he won't mind having Pam around if it makes Bobby happy. Bobby tries to tell Ray to be a little more understanding of his pregnant wife but Ray reacts angrily to Bobby's hypocrisy. In a typical blockhead Ray Krebbs moment, he tells everyone within earshot about Jenna's pregnancy...including Pam, who's standing in the doorway.

Episode 231: Bells are Ringing  Aired: Tue, Dec. 29

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Ray has a big mouth." - Jenna to JR. There were funnier lines, but none rang more true.

Alternate: "You are going to have a hard time swallowing this if you say another word." - Jack to Cliff. Submitted by AHN Jason, who points out that it could be really funny depending on how you look at it.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Donna.

Bobby turns around to find Pam standing in the doorway. They go off together to talk privately and Pam wonders how their marriage can ever work with the new twist in their love triangle. Bobby says he doesn't want to throw away what they have because he's afraid he'll lose Pam forever.

Jamie tells Donna and Sue Ellen what she heard and Donna immediately jumps to the conclusion that it's Ray's child. The half-breed assures her that he's not the father. Word spreads amongst the major characters like wildfire and Cliff gets understandably upset after hearing the news. Ellie tells the assembled throng that there will be a slight delay. JR calls a moping Jenna and confirms the news. He invites her to come to the wedding - as Bobby's bride. Jenna says that if she had wanted that, she would have told Bobby about the child herself.

Despite the machinations behind the scenes, Pam and Bobby decide to go ahead with the ceremony and during the pastor's speech, the reunited lovers think back to their first spur-of-the-moment ceremony. Afterwards, the rest of the family adjourn to the living room and the duelling spouses trade barbs. Clayton gets upset when he learns of Wes Parmalee's brief appearance at the ceremony. Later, Pam laments the fact that Jenna is going to give Bobby what she never can - his own child. Bobby reminds her that she's the one he married.

The next day, Ray apologizes to Jenna for being such a lame-brained half-breed blabbermouth. She says she hasn't decided whether to have the child or not. Just then [can you guess?] Bobby shows up. Jenna tells him she has nothing to say to him and he should go back to his bride.

JR shows up at Valentine's for an appointment and Sue Ellen accidentally comes out to the front and bumps into him. Fortunately for her, she's able to convince him that she's just shopping.

Jack has another poolside confrontation with April. He tells her he's willing to do whatever it takes to get her to leave Dallas because now she's messing up his sister's life, not to mention consorting with Cliff. Cliff happens to come by at the same time and Jack angrily pushes him into the pool for being such a sneak.

Harry McSween reports to JR about Jack. He confirms that Jack was married to April and tells him about the details of their divorce settlement. JR asks Jack to sell him his 10 percent of Ewing Oil before April gets her half. Jack says he's not interested in selling - especially not to him. JR says this was his last offer.

Pam and Bobby have dinner at the Oil Baron's Club with Ellie and Clayton and Jordan Lee and Andy Bradley come by and ask him about the rumors of Jock Ewing's return. Bobby angrily denies it.

Sue Ellen pays Wes Parmalee another visit and tells him to stay away from John Ross until his proofs are verified. Wes notes the ironic similarity he shares with his grandson. He reminds her about the time of John Ross's birth, when JR didn't believe that John Ross was his son. Sue Ellen is shocked that Wes could possibly have known that...

Bobby visits Jenna's boutique [WOW! She's working!] and they have another argument. This time, Jenna says she doesn't plan to involve Bobby in her life or her child's and as far as she's concerned, the child has no father. Pam tells Bobby that he had better decide what his involvement with his past flame is going to be.

As promised, Ellie meets Parmalee at the museum. He tells her how terrible it is for him that his own family is denying him - and that his wife spends her nights with another man. He wonders what might be if there were no Clayton [oh, we can only dream, Wes.]

JR makes his final arrangements with BD Calhoun and reiterates his desire to keep his name out of the incident. Franklin Horner stops by JR's office and says that he's heard the rumours surrounding Wes Parmalee and JR predictably pooh-poohs the whole thing. Franklin says that the remainder of their line of credit is being held up until the issue is cleared up. Mr. Gordon calls from South America. He's found that the surgeons recognize the pictures he took down and Parmalee's story checks out completely. Gordon's willing to bet that the man is really Jock Ewing.

Episode 232: Who's Who at the Oil Baron's Ball  Aired: Wed, Dec. 30

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Who sold that son of a bitch a ticket?" JR to no one in particular when Wes Parmalee takes the stage at the Oil Baron's Ball.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Jenna is only in one scene.

Clayton arrives at the museum and spots Parmalee leaving his tryst with Ellie. He predictably gets terribly upset at Ellie for not telling him about what happened and says he's not sure what to think. That night, Clayton has insomnia and says he went after Parmalee that evening and found that he's left his motel. Clayton gets angry again because Ellie seems to be leading him on and drawing him closer instead of getting him out of their lives. Ellie sadly says she has to be sure of whether or not he is Jock, and Clayton laments the fact that he seems to be fighting ghosts again.

JR and Bobby talk to a small oil man whose company they were planning to buy. They tell him that there'll be a small delay to arrange financing and are told that Weststar has made a good offer as well. The company owner says he can only give them a week or so and then he has to make a decision. Bobby tells JR he would like for Jenna to keep the baby but she won't listen to him. In a rare brotherly moment, JR asks him to honestly think about whether he's just being selfish to ask her that.

Sue Ellen and Ozwald meet with Mandy's agent, who's been getting lots of offers in Hollywood for 'exploitation' films. Ozwald is expressly against losing his meal ticket but Sue Ellen says she'll think about it.

A dude from the CIA accosts JR and asks him about his conversation with BD Calhoun, who's been under surveillance for some time. JR feigns ignorance and says he knows nothing about what Calhoun is doing right now. He is told that the government knows he's headed to the Middle East with a gang of mercenaries. The Man in Black also warns him to be very careful that he doesn't get mixed up in another one of Calhoun's wacky schemes - seems he's made a career out of bilking wealthy businessmen.

Cliff invites April to the Oil Baron's Ball and she gladly accepts. April gets a message from JR that he has a $ 10,000 check waiting for her if she wants to come and get it. She's interested enough to go and talk to him about it on the roof of the Ewing building. JR explains that it will probably take a court battle to get her share of Ewing Oil, and he's willing to finance her legal fees and other expenses if she promises to sell her five percent to him and not that idiot Barnes.

Donna tells Ray she's had a check-up and everything is fine. She plans to return to Washington after the Oil Baron's Ball. Ray says he doesn't really feel like going to the ball with her, and he certainly doesn't want to go without her. Donna tells him that Bobby wants to talk to Jenna about their baby but Ray insists that Jenna's baby is her own and Bobby has no right to interfere in her decision. Donna's amazed to hear him say that when his own wife may be in a similar situation soon.

Wes Parmalee wakes up after a nightmare in which he relives a plane crash.

Sue Ellen meets with Bruce Harvey, a Hollywood producer who's very interested in Mandy. She tells him she thinks it might be good for Mandy to get out of Dallas for a while - perhaps a project in the Far East. She even says she's willing to finance it - as long as it's carefully planned out and very 'artistic'. She also says she'll arrange a date and tickets for him to attend the Oil Baron's Ball, on the condition that their relationship is kept an absolute secret.

Cliff tells Jack he's changed his mind about buying his shares and wants his money back. Jack says he's finally decided to sell to him for $ 125 million. Cliff gets angry, Jamie shows up, and they gang up on him, reminding him that a deal is a deal. Cliff leaves in a huff to Jack's delight but Jamie is pensive.

Dr. Harland examines X-rays of Parmalee and compares them to some old records of Jock. He finds several rib fractures that are almost exactly like Jock's injuries - and many more.

The Oil Baron's Ball dawns and Ellie is reunited with Mavis Anderson, with whom she chats about Wes Parmalee's continued presence in Dallas. Pam confronts Cliff about coming to the wedding and the ball with April rather than his own wife. Bruce Harvey arrives with Mandy as his date and Sue Ellen comments to JR that Mandy doesn't look so trashy in person. Mandy tells JR about her plans to be in one of Bruce's movies and he gets upset at her treatment of him. She comments that Sue Ellen's looking better so he must be doing something right.

April tells JR she'll accept his proposition - and any other one he'd like to make. Donna's a wallflower for the time being, and in the meantime, Ray and Jenna enjoy themselves at a roller rink.

Punk calls Ellie up to announce the winners of the Jock Ewing memorial scholarship as Wes Parmalee climbs up to the stage and takes the mike. Bobby, JR, and Clayton protest but Ellie tells them to let Wes talk. He announces to the world that there's no need for a memorial scholarship because Jock Ewing is not dead. He also says that he's submitted to all the medical tests as requested and passed with flying colors. Punk admits that he knows things that only Jock would know.

Wes declares that he's been pushed far enough and announces that if anyone wants to do business with Ewing Oil, he's the man to talk to. Jeremy Wendell immediately takes the opportunity to go over and talk to him. JR and Bobby ask him to submit a lie-detector test. Parmalee reminds them that polygraphs aren't very reliable but agrees to do it. Clayton tells Parmalee that if Wes turns out to be a liar, he'll hunt him down and kill him.

Episode 233: Proof Positive  Aired: Thu, Dec. 31

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY: "For what we're paying him, he ought to be sleeping on our front porch." - JR to Bobby about contacting Harve at a late hour.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Donna.

JR and Bobby argue the whole way home, and no one else really feels like talking.  JR determines to call Harve to set up a polygraph test ASAP. Clayton just goes upstairs and starts packing his things, saying he can't live with her while she thinks that Wes is Jock. JR is angry at Clayton's departure because of how it's going to look to the public but Ellie tells him to mind his own business. Ellie asks Ray to arrange a meeting with Wes Parmalee, because she knows they keep in touch.  

Cliff cabbages to April what could happen if Wes Parmalee is proven to be Jock - she'd lose her potential share of Ewing Oil. April asks for $1 million for her potential share but Cliff turns her down. April decides to take a cab home instead of staying with him. The next day, April tells Jack she found out about his deal with Cliff and says she wants half of the money he got from Cliff for her share. Jack says he doesn't feel she's entitled to anything and tells her to take a hike.

Sue Ellen takes Pam to Valentine's Lingerie and tells her she bought the business. Bruce Harvey shows Mandy the results of her original screen test and tells her she's a [snicker] smashing success. Her agent wants her to sign contracts right away but she says she has to talk to someone first. Sue Ellen seems unperturbed.

Wes Parmalee is able to convince Jock's old tailor to extend him some credit to get a new wardrobe made. JR and Bobby get a taste of what's involved with the polygraph test and are quite impressed.

Charlie and Jenna go out together for dinner and have a chance to talk about the future. Jenna tells her that she intends on having the baby and they'll just have to get used to being their own family. Charlie says that she's gotten over her initial anger at leaving Southfork and she'll be fine.

Ray meets Clayton at his hotel and invites him to come live at his house instead of at a hotel and insists on not taking "No" for an answer. He then goes over to talk to Parmalee and relays his message from Ellie.

Jamie finally decides to leave Barnes-Wentworth - and Cliff. Cliff shoos her away because he's more focused on an environmental problem in the Gulf - he's about to be shut down. After overhearing him talk to an EPA official, Jamie thinks she might know what the problem is but he just ignores her again.

Pam goes over to Jenna's boutique to talk about her baby. She says that she doesn't want Jenna to abort her child - she wants to adopt it. Jenna rightfully tells her where to stick that idea and then tells her to get lost. [OH HELL YEAH! for Jenna.]

Parmalee arrives for his lie detector test as JR and Bobby wait at the office, confident that the man will be proven a fraud. Wes is asked if he went to South America with Punk Anderson in 1981 and had a plane accident there. Then he's finally asked whether or not he is Jock Ewing. Parmalee confidently answers yes and the polygraph doesn't register a blip.

Mandy meets with JR at the Texas Stadium private box and tells him about her fantastic opportunity in Hollywood and says she'll give it all up if he'll leave Sue Ellen and marry her. JR says that though he meant it once, it could never happen. Mandy tearfully says goodbye.

Jamie tells Jack about Cliff's drilling problem and he confirms that she was right about her suggestion to Cliff. He tells her to be patient because it'll be her opportunity to turn the screws to Cliff soon.

Parmalee shows up at Southfork unannounced to talk to Ellie alone. Ellie says that their situation is driving the family apart and she doesn't know what the truth is. Wes responds that she must know the truth because she didn't deny him at the Oil Baron's Ball. He also says that Ellie is going to have to make her choice between Clayton and himself soon.

Harve tells the stunned Ewing brothers that Parmalee passed the test with flying colors. Wes shows up at the office and tells the assembled group that Jeremy Wendell has offered to buy Ewing Oil - and he might do it.

Episode 234: Something Old, Something New  Aired: Mon, Jan.4

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY: "I'm easy." - Ray. No comment. Nominated by Jason.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: The Ramboski is totally absent.

Bobby drives over to Ray's place to see him and Clayton. He tells them he's going to South America to find out what he can about Parmalee. They want to accompany him but he says it's better if they stay at the ranch.

Mandy signs her movie contract ensuring that she's heading off to the Orient. She turns to find Sue Ellen watching the entire scene and finds that she was the one behind Valentine's Lingerie - and the movie deal. She also says that she's actually doing Mandy a favor by getting her away from JR because she never would have been happy with him. Mandy says that it's a shame that JR doesn't appreciate his wife.

Jamie says her final goodbyes to Barnes-Wentworth and to Pam and Jackie. Pam tells her that Cliff is still worried about his problems in the Gulf and Jamie says she has the answer to his problem but he's unwilling to listen to her. She resolves to help Cliff no matter what. Later she tries to tell him but he's still in his insulting mood so she just insults him back and leaves.

Jenna angrily comes to Bobby's office and tells her about Pam's selfish, boneheaded request to adopt her child. She also says she plans to sell the boutique and pay Bobby back the money he loaned her to start it - and that her baby will never know it's father's name.

JR tells Ellie that he's been having trouble keeping Ewing Oil going because of Wes Parmalee and says that she isn't helping matters much by sitting on the fence about him. Ellie responds that she can't bring herself to turn her back on Parmalee while the possibility exists that he might be her long lost husband. JR responds that his father would never sell Ewing Oil but Ellie responds that under the circumstances, she thinks that's exactly what Jock would do to lash out at the people who hurt him.

JR calls Mr. Gordon and says he wants to get in touch with BD Calhoun again. That night, Sue Ellen shows JR a taped talk show introducing female entrepreneurs - including her as the head of Valentine's Lingerie. JR compliments her an a very innovative solution to her problem and she responds that she had a great teacher.

Ray tells Jenna about Bobby's trip to South America and the danger that Ewing Oil is in. Jenna also tells him about Pam's offer and says she understands why she did it. Bobby talks to Pam about her silly offer and says he also understands.

The next morning, Bobby says goodbye to the family and he and JR say that they'll move out of the ranch if Parmalee is brought to Southfork as Ellie's husband. Ellie drives out to visit Clayton and tries to make him understand how she's been torn by the possibility of her husband returning. Their conversation doesn't really go anywhere and Ellie leaves. Meanwhile, Bobby gets people working to find all of the Americans who were in South America at the time of Jock's plane crash.

Pam tells Cliff that she wants to buy 25% ownership of Barnes-Wentworth in order to feel like she's needed at the office. In return, she agrees to continue to provide the capital he needs to keep the company going.

JR gets a call from Calhoun and says he wants to abort the mission because of the threats from the CIA. Calhoun said that JR had his chance to back out and his name is going to be kept out of it, as promised. JR is persistent but Calhoun says that the mission will continue as planned. JR meets with the Man in Black and says he wants to make a deal in exchange for information about BD Calhoun.

JR and April Stevens have lunch and Jeremy Wendell stops by, warning him that Ewing Oil won't be doing much business on its own - now that he'll be the owner once he consummates his deal with the newly returned Jock Ewing. With the prospect of getting nothing out of her divorce settlement, April says that she might be able to do something to actually earn her five percent...

Ellie gets a call from Parmalee requesting a meeting. It turns out he's got a horse-drawn carriage waiting to take her to dinner. At the end of their ride, Ellie says she wants to talk about her mixed-up feelings but Wes says they can talk later as he plants a passionate series of kisses on her.

Episode 235: Bar-B-Cued  Aired: Tue, Jan.5

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY: "I'm doing exactly what you haven't done to me since we got married" - Jamie to Cliff after she presents him with a 2 million dollar bill for her services. Nominated by Kyle and Jason.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Jenna is the invisible woman today.

Ellie comes home and is shocked to discover that JR had her and Parmalee followed. JR says it's going to come down to a choice between Parmalee and her sons. JR goes to tell Clayton about Ellie's tryst and asks him to return to Southfork but Clayton refuses, saying that Ellie will have to make her choice on her own.

Donna and Dave Culver speak with Senator Andrew Dowling to garner support for their cause. The Senator gets a call from the President and says he'll reschedule their appointment. Later, they meet again and Dowling says that she won't get much support unless she can find a way to convince people that bigger oil companies will be hurt as well by the world crisis.

Cliff tells Pam that because of something Jamie reminded him about, he was able to solve the problem in the Gulf. He wants to finalize his agreement with Pam and she confirms that she'll provide him with all of the money he needs - but she demands to have final say over how much she'll give him for any major deals.

Bobby speaks with the plastic surgeon who reconstructed Parmalee's face. The surgeon confirms that Parmalee was a total amnesiac for eight months - until one night he said he remembered that his name was Jock Ewing. Bobby tells JR about it and they both confirm that they're worried.

Meanwhile, Parmalee finalizes his deal with Jeremy Wendell, who is surprised that Wendell is willing to fork out a lot of money before he is proven to be Jock Ewing. Jeremy replies that he doesn't really care what happens - he just wants to hurt the Ewings somehow, and he figures at worst he can tie them up in litigation for a long time.

Ozwald Valentine tells Sue Ellen that he's gotten a great offer to sell his company - and he also knows that she's a Ewing. Sue Ellen says she doesn't want to sell out - but she's willing to buy him out if he wants. Ozwald is surprised at her confidence and says he won't sell.

Cliff takes Jamie to lunch and apologizes for treating her like an idiot. They agree to dissolve their marriage and not have any claims on each other. Jamie hands him a bill for 2 million dollars for solving his problem in the Gulf. Faced with the possibility of having to deal with a divorce settlement, Cliff has no choice but to agree.

Pam tries to comfort Miss Ellie during her trying time and asks her to think about whether she's attracted to Wes Parmalee or the possibility he might be Jock. JR confers with Sly about transferring some of Ewing Oil's assets to his dummy corporations and since he feels he can trust her, he asks her to become President of one of those corporations. Phyllis interrupts to tell JR that there's been an explosion at a major Saudi oil field.

April spots Wes Parmalee at an upscale hangout and buys him a drink. They talk for a while about his adventures in South America and April says she finds him fascinating. She listens to his whole story and April says she also finds him very attractive...but he says he's already got a special lady. April calls JR and tells him that if Wes isn't Jock Ewing, he deserves an Oscar.

Ellie goes over to see Clayton and tells him that she's decided that no matter what happens, there won't be any more ghosts for him. Even if Parmalee turns out to be Jock, he's not the Jock she knew because too much has happened since he's been gone. After being totally stymied in South America and preparing to leave, a guy suddenly calls Bobby and says he remembers something about Parmalee.

The Ewing Barbecue comes 'round once again. JR confronts Pam about buying into Barnes-Wentworth and aiding Cliff in his vendetta against the Ewings, which Pam says she's adamantly opposed to. April bumps in to Jack and gives him a court order stating that her divorce settlement is valid in Texas. Jack shows her a bill of sale indicating that he sold his share of Ewing Oil to Jamie - for a dollar. Jack hands her two quarters and sends her on her way.

Cliff, as always, is incredulous, and heads off in search of Jamie. He says he wants to get back together with her because the bed's too big without her. JR and Sue Ellen interrupt their conversation and Cliff gets mouthy about Parmalee's proposed sale of Ewing Oil, which causes JR to smack him.

Wes Parmalee [did you guess?] shows up and says he wants to talk to Ellie. Ray tries to stop him and says that he could never believe that the Jock Ewing he knew would cause so much pain to the family.

Bobby returns and asks Punk about a man named Wyatt Haines, who was around when Jock was very sick with fever and rambling about his life. They rush into the house to find Ellie there alone, and she says that she knows that Wes was not Jock. The boys rush outside and Mavis tells them that Parmalee's already left. Clayton resolves to find him and make him pay for what he's done to the family.

Episode 236: The Fire Next Time  Aired: Wed, Jan.6

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY: "Now I know why they call you Sly." - JR to Sly when she asks for a raise. Nominated by Jason.
Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Tough call. April, I guess.

JR and Bobby tell the assembled throng about Wes's disproven claims and say there's finally something to celebrate. Everyone reassembles in the livingroom and Bobby tells everyone the story. He says that Jock's helicopter picked up Wyatt Haines just before it took off, which nobody knew about. Haines was also around when Jock rambled during his jungle fever, which is why he knew so much about him. Clayton goes upstairs to ask Ellie about what Parmalee told her. She claims that she's tired and confused right now but she'll talk about it later.

Donna and Senator Dowling continue to talk and find they don't agree on anything political. Cliff tries to convince Pam to talk to Jamie to win her back.

Franklin Horner visits JR and tells him that the bank is proud to stand behind Ewing Oil and reactivate their line of credit - with reduced collateral and a better interest rate. JR reminds him that he wasn't around when he needed him - and so he won't be around to share in the good times. Franklin is unceremoniously removed from the premises. Meanwhile Bobby makes arrangements to deal with another bank.

The next morning, Ellie finally talks to Clayton about Wes. She says he was an oil and cattle man, just like Jock, and had a family just like the Ewings. Clayton gets understandably upset and says he wants to know why Parmalee came clean. Ellie claims that Parmalee claimed to do it out of love for Ellie, and said that he would see her again. Clayton said he also vowed to kill Parmalee if he was a fraud and he intends to do it. Ellie tries to find one of the boys at the office to stop him but they're both out.

JR learns from April about Jack's sale of his share of Ewing Oil to Jamie. She says she intends to prove fraudulent intent on Jack's part to nullify the sale. JR spots Wendell at the Oil Baron's Club and rubs in the fact that he'll never be able to touch Ewing Oil again.

The Man in Black [actually, brown today] pays a visit to Ewing Oil and tells JR that BD Calhoun was not identified as being amongst the dead in Saudi Arabia, so he's probably still around. JR asks him for the protection he was promised but is told that he's on his own. That night before dinner, Clayton is still absent until Harry McSween calls and says they've found him at the Oil Baron's Club.. Sue Ellen reveals that Jamie's left for Los Angeles to take care of Valentine's west coast operations.

Ray, Jenna, and Charlie have dinner and Donna arrives. Escaping from the awkwardness of the moment, Jenna and Charlie dash off and leave the Krebbses to talk. Donna tells Ray that she's decided she wants a divorce and even has the papers ready for him to sign. They have a painful goodbye.

Ellie finds Clayton at the Oil Baron's Club and he says that he obviously wasn't able to find Parmalee. Ellie encourages him to let go of his hate and move on with their lives.

Donna and Jenna have lunch and Jenna says that her relationship with Ray is just friendly. She also doesn't want to see them break up just because they can't communicate. Donna admits that she might be a little jealous and Jenna advises her to be sure before she finalizes her divorce.

Pam and Sue Ellen talk in the exercise room while John Ross and Christopher argue in the background. They get in to a shoving match and Pam says that John Ross is getting to be just like his father. Sue Ellen wonders why Pam is getting so overprotective of her son and she admits that she's concerned about the fact that Bobby will have another child soon.

Wendell invites Cliff into his office and tells him that he should use Pam's presence at Southfork to his advantage in order to help him keep the Ewings down. Cliff self-righteously says he'd never do that to Pam [yeah, right] but Wendell grows more and more persuasive and says he's going to take the Ewings down with or without him. JR and Bobby learn that there's been a line break in one of their Galveston fields. JR immediately suspects that it was sabotage - perpetrated by Jeremy Wendell. JR gets a call from BD Calhoun who says he was responsible for the pipeline rupture - and he says there's more trouble to come.

Episode 237: So Shall Ye Reap  Aired: Thu, Jan.7

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY: "Think I will join you"  - JR pouring himself a drink and sitting down next to the frazzled Sly after finding Gordon dead in his office.  Great scene. Nominated by AHN Jason
Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Sue Ellen, though Jenna was close.

JR asks Mr. Gordon to find BD Calhoun and convince him that their whole affair was a misunderstanding. He wants to offer Calhoun money to forget the whole thing.

Pam doesn't want to let Christopher go on a field trip because she's afraid he'll be involved in a horrible bus accident. [MUST...RESIST...URGE...TO...RANT...there, it's gone.] Bobby wonders why Pam has become so overprotective of him and they get into an argument over the complications that Jenna's baby will cause but Bobby says that will be dealt with when the time comes. Pam, of course, is still petulant about the whole thing.

Donna talks to Ellie about her impending divorce from Ray. She says she plans to leave Southfork so as not to make things difficult for Ray and the family.

Jeremy Wendell finds April downtown and offers her a lift in his limo. They talk for a while and he says he's interested in her potential share of Ewing Oil - and her closeness to JR. He asks April to try and get some information out of JR in bed in exchange for future considerations.

Jenna gives Bobby a check after her sale of the boutique and they argue about her child. Bobby says he's going to do whatever it takes to make the child know its father, despite Jenna's vehement objections that everyone would be better off if they stayed apart.

Pam meets with Jordan Lee and learns that Cliff recouped his investment from their deal, which makes Pam wonder where the money has gone. Cliff learns about their lunch from Jackie and realizes that the jig is up so he decides to make himself scarce for a while.

JR buys April an apartment and says he's found Jamie in California so they can start working on getting her ownership of Ewing Oil back. April offers herself to him but JR turns her down for now. She then calls Jeremy Wendell and lets him know about her new digs.

Gordon contacts JR and says Calhoun wants to arrange a morning meeting. JR arrives at the office the next day to find Gordon dead in a chair, and a memo paper-clipped to his suit says "No deal". JR calls Harry McSween to remove the body from the premises and he does so, saying it'll cost JR a few favors. JR explains to a frazzled Sly that it's all part of an OPEC plot to harass independent oil men, and even offers her a raise for her devotion over the years.

Ray visits Donna at her office and asks her what her plans for the future are. She says that she plans to relocate to Washington with the baby. Ray visits Paul Morgan and says he wants to know what rights he has as the father of Donna's child.

Clayton calls the polygraph expert who questioned Parmalee and asks for a meeting. He asks Ellie to accompany him there to try and achieve some closure and she grudgingly agrees. The polygraph guy says that Parmalee's the only guy who's ever beaten the polygraph and he must have somehow convinced himself he was telling the truth.

Pam confronts Cliff about his double dealing and he tries to explain it away as getting out of a bad deal. Pam doesn't believe it and says she wants her money back, but Cliff says it's in Jack's house, and Jamie's house...he just needs some time. Pam says if she doesn't have it back in a week, she's going to take her money and go home.

JR interviews personal security people and then gets a call from BD Calhoun saying that his office is bugged - and he can remove the bug if he wants, because another one can always be put in. Calhoun says he's going to make sure JR's always looking his shoulder for a while.

Sue Ellen meets with her advertising executive to began the search for the new Valentine girl. A stranger shows up claiming to be an old friend of the Ewings and says he might see her again sometime. Pleased with himself, BD Calhoun walks away.

Episode 238: Tick Tock  Aired: Fri, Jan.8

NITPICKS for this episode

LINES OF THE DAY: 
"I'm sure he'll even be able to tell one end of the horse from the other." - JR about Ray.
"We all know which end of the horse you are." - Sue Ellen to JR.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Donna, though Ellie was right there too.

JR has another meeting with the Man in Black and tells him about Gordon's death and the fact that BD Calhoun is still after him. The Man reiterates that JR will have to get out of his own mess and this will be their last meeting.

Jenna has dinner [sigh] at Ray's place again and they discuss Ray's impending divorce. Ray mentions that he's considering fighting Donna for custody of their child. Jenna voices her disagreement because she feels that the child's place is with its mother. Ray says her situation is different from his own, because Donna's the one running away from the marriage. [Yeah, sure, Ray. Whatever.]

Bobby tells Pam about his conversation with Jenna a few days ago. He says he's going to use Jenna's check to start a trust fund for her baby. Pam gets upset that Bobby would do that when Christopher doesn't have a trust fund of his own. Bobby replies that Christopher doesn't need a trust fund but Pam is in no mood to listen.

JR and Sly have lunch with Harry McSween, who says that the FBI has caught the leaders of the terrorist ring that has been harassing American oil men. Sly seems to calm down after hearing the news. Meanwhile, Calhoun plays with some of explosive toys.

The next morning, Pam tells Cliff that she thinks it's a bad idea to pump so much oil out of Gold Canyon 340, but Cliff tells her that she doesn't have any right to interfere in his business. She reminds him that he only has a few days to return her money from his wacky investment and Cliff says he'll do whatever he must to get it.

Clayton and Ray decide to immerse themselves in their new venture to forget about their troubles. Donna gets a call from Senator Dowling, who's wondering when she's planning to return to Washington. He says he misses their arguments and Donna says she'll be back in a few days.

Pam and Sue Ellen go shopping and Pam buys a whole bunch of things for her uggie-wuggie snookums. Pam tells Sue Ellen about the new trust fund and Sue Ellen mentions that she shouldn't be so jealous of Jenna's child. BD Calhoun bumps into Sue Ellen and manages to get her car keys out of her purse. Sue Ellen doesn't realize until she gets back to her car and curiously finds them missing.

Cliff visits Wendell at his swank pad and says he needs his help to secure a loan. Wendell says he'll do it if he offers his share of Wentworth Tool and Die as collateral. Faced with no choice, Cliff agrees. Wendell asks Cliff about April and he describes her as a money-hungry bitch who he's glad he dumped. April comes out from behind the palm trees and comments on what a bitter little man Cliff is.

Ray, Jenna, and Charlie go bowling and have their first "Full House" moment when Charlie wins their game. Charlie finds her friend Marnie at the bowling alley and decides to stick around as Ray and Jenna head home.

Bobby stupidly sets up a swimming race between John Ross and Christopher which the older boy easily wins by taking a head start. They get into a shoving match and their parents have to break them apart. Pam says if John Ross can't play nicely, then maybe they shouldn't play at all. Later, John Ross feels bad about taking a head start but JR assures him that he was just a little bit anxious to win - and his father is glad he won.

April bumps into Cliff at the Oil Baron's Club and asks him where Jamie is. He says he only knows that she's in Los Angeles, and if she really wants to find her, she ought to ask Sue Ellen. Cliff manages to come up with half of Pam's money, to her surprise. She says it's a good start but he better get his act together.

Ellie suggests that she and Clayton take a trip to get away from things for a while. Clayton says that he wouldn't feel right about leaving Ray when they've just started their new business. Ray stops by and Ellie learns that Clayton has arranged for the three of them to go and look at some new horses.

The next morning, Bobby comes to Ewing Oil to find a cleaning man still busy at work in his room. BD Calhoun quickly finishes up as he enters his office. Sue Ellen starts looking for a new Valentine Girl but doesn't find any one who has the extra zing of Mandy Winger.

A shadowy figure walks through the upper Southfork hallway late at night and quietly opens doors and looks through the rooms. Calhoun finds JR's room and puts his explosive alarm clock next to his bed.

Episode 239: Night Visitor  Aired: Mon, Jan.11

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY: "I got so excited by the idea (of JR in her room) that I went right back to sleep." - Sue Ellen at the breakfast table.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Tie between April and Ellie.

The clock continues to tick next to JR's bed but fortunately he wakes up and quite alertly defuses the bomb. He notes the word 'BOOM' in red paint on the inside of his bedroom door. He checks on John Ross and Sue Ellen, who are both fine. He wakes up the next morning and goes into a tirade about the lack of security [I'm seriously laughing my head off here] at Southfork, including the lack of a proper burglar alarm. JR calls Harry McSween for an urgent meeting. Harry checks out JR's office and finds it bug-free. JR is forced to tell him that Calhoun is the one after him.

Clayton continues to be distracted by the Wes Parmalee fiasco and tells Ray he can't just forget it like everyone else seems to. He gets private investigators to track him down and is told the Wes is probably still somewhere around Texas but is virtually untraceable unless he wants to be found.

Meanwhile Ellie meets with Jenna after a long separation and they discuss the wonders of childbirth. Jenna tells her that she doesn't want her child to have anything to do with the Ewings and she'll be fine on her own.

Bobby arranges a great deal for some oil tracts in the Gulf, to JR's delight. He questions JR about the sudden desire for security and JR claims that he's just concerned about the return of Wes Parmalee.

The search for the Valentine Girl continues and Sue Ellen finds a girl who she thinks might be the perfect candidate. As she leaves the agency, Calhoun watches her turn the corner.

Paul Morgan tells Ray he wasn't able to find much to help his case and says he'd like to get custody of the child. Paul says that to do so, he'd have to prove that Donna's an unfit mother. Even still, he's told that he would have to temporarily cut his ties to Jenna to avoid the appearance of impropriety. He finds it difficult to do so, especially after Jenna tells him how great their time together has been for Charlie and herself, but he does. He also notes the irony of the fact that they just both wanted families to be with and must have just fell in love with the wrong people.

Cliff still hedges on whether to use Pam to help Jeremy Wendell but discovers that his recent troubles with his refineries and his workers' union have been instigated by Wendell himself.

There's a cute scene where Pam and Bobby discuss JR's new found need for security and Bobby dumps a dressed-for-bed Christopher into the pool, but it really does nothing for the plot. Pam takes Christopher to work during a school holiday and gets an earful from Cliff about how distant she and Christopher have become since she moved back to Southfork.  

Donna gets an invitation to dinner from Senator Dowling, but takes a rain check because she's already meeting Dave Culver. Dave notices she looks kind of sick and she suddenly has some severe abdominal pain. [Gee, no one saw that coming.] Donna's rushed to the hospital and Ray arrives the next morning. It turns out Donna just got appendicitis. Senator Dowling breaks up their conversation to wish Donna well but Ray is perturbed by his presence.

JR goes to April's apartment to find her 'waiting' for him - if you smell what April's cooking. JR takes some target practice the next day in preparation for buying a gun. Bobby sees him doing some Double-O-Seven posing and asks him point-blank what the heck is going on. JR reiterates that he's just concerned about Parmalee. Bobby is distracted by something but promises they'll finish their conversation later. Meanwhile, Sly happens to pop into the office, sees the gun, and freaks out again.

Calhoun finds Sue Ellen at a coffee shop and manages to slip a little something into her java. The waitress makes some small talk with her about Mandy and Sue Ellen suddenly gets real woozy and then passes out. Calhoun returns to her table claiming to be a friend, and will take care of her.

Episode 240: Cat and Mouse  Aired: Tue, Jan.12

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Did you spend last night in your car too- in the back seat?" - Sue Ellen to JR after she returns home.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Clayton and Ellie. Gone after the first scene.

The family worries about Donna and Sue Ellen, while JR tries to get amorous with April again. She, on the other hand, is more concerned about finding Jack and Jamie. Ray discusses Donna's relationship with Senator Dowling with Dave and gets upset that it looks like the Senator is going to inherit his family.

Pam continues to worry when JR and Sue Ellen both fail to come home. She's concerned that Sue Ellen might have fallen off the wagon again. Bobby has to promise to call the Sheriff in the morning just to shut her up. JR arrives home in the morning and learns the news. He comes to the same conclusion as Pam until Sue Ellen arrives a few minutes later. JR questions her as to her whereabouts and she says she can't remember where she was - she just woke up in her car in a parking lot, and she wasn't drinking. Unfortunately, no one believes her story.

Charlie gets impatient at being out of touch with Ray - and Darius. Jenna tries to shrug it off by saying Ray's a busy guy. Ray tells his lawyer that he thinks Donna's finding a new perfect husband, but Paul Morgan replies that it won't matter a whole lot.

JR arrives at the office to find a confidential package for him from BD Calhoun, containing snapshots of Sue Ellen lying in bed next to the smiling commando. He returns home to show Sue Ellen the pictures. She denies having an affair and says she saw the other guy in the picture in the coffee shop yesterday, but they just said hello. Then she remembers getting dizzy and not remembering anything else until waking up that morning. Finally, she remembers that the mysterious stranger also claimed to know JR.

Cliff gives Pam another 6 million dollars and asks her to forego the other half a million dollars for now. She agrees and then he asks her to tell him what companies the Ewings are bidding for, so that he won't be tempted to bid against them. Pam gives him the name of the sole company, after some hesitation.

Bobby confronts JR about all of the silly things that have been going on and JR is forced to show him the pictures he got from Calhoun. Bobby recognizes Calhoun as being the janitor in his office the other day. He wants to call the police but JR warns him that if the FBI were to find out about their involvement with this guy, they could lose their business license. They have a full-scale argument about his crazy scheme and Bobby is disgusted at his shenanigans.

Senator Dowling is waiting for Donna as she is released. They take the long walk out to the elevator and discuss her feelings about her divorce. Donna says she's starting to let go of her marriage.

Cliff meets with Wendell and passes on the information he got from Pam. Wendell shoos Cliff away from the table and calls April, who's exercising in a catsuit. He asks her to see what she can find out from JR about it.

Sherlock Bobby gets the photographs that were sent by Calhoun blown up and is able to discover what hotel he took Sue Ellen to. JR asks Sue Ellen to try and remember what name Calhoun used and she is finally able to provide it after some thought. JR promises her that he's not going to bother any of the family ever again but says he can't tell her any of the details about the man. JR calls Calhoun's hotel and finds that he's left word that he won't return until tomorrow night.

Cliff awakes to find an exceedingly tall woman in his kitchen making breakfast who expects to move in with him for some reason - except that he keeps harping about some 'Pam' person. She leaves, commenting that Pam must be a really lucky woman.

Bobby asks Pam to stay home for a while and keep Christopher with her. Despite the strange nature of the request, Pam agrees.

Jenna goes psycho on Charlie again and she retorts that she must be going through Krebbs withdrawal.

JR and Bobby go to Calhoun's hotel room but find it empty - except for a VCR and a tape with JR's name on it. On the tape, Calhoun comments that JR was very smart to find him - now he's worth killing.

Episode 241: High Noon for Calhoun  Aired: Wed, Jan.13

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "But you make them again and again..." - Jeremy Wendell to Cliff when he comments that people always make mistakes.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Jenna. Off the booking sheets completely.

John Ross and Christopher play baseball in the upper hallway and predictably break a lamp. Bobby and JR return home and tell the girls they've got important business to discuss. The whole explanation is given to Pam, Sue Ellen, and Ray - with a slight slant from JR relieving himself of any guilt in the matter. He says that Calhoun contacted and duped him into thinking that he was a straight shooter. Pam doesn't believe his explanation and Bobby says he doesn't believe it completely either, but what's important now is to protect the family, so the women and children will have to go away for a while.

Wendell arrives at April's apartment just as she steps out of the shower. Jeremy really interested in what April's cooking so he asks her to put some clothes on. She says that she asked JR whether or not he's serious about buying the mining company from last episode and couldn't tell for sure. Wendell says he knows where Jack is, of which April is skeptical. He says he won't tell until he gets what he wants and abruptly leaves, leaving April alone for the night yet again,

JR tells a sleeping John Ross that he only did what he did out of fear that the empire he was building for his son was being threatened. Sue Ellen overhears him and says she wishes he was as good a husband as he is a father.

Pam, Sue Ellen, and the kids prepare to head to the airport, destination Los Angeles. JR heads to the office, figuring that the best thing to do is to let Calhoun find him. Bobby accompanies him and they find the office eerily empty. Drawing their guns, they check out the offices as cop show music is played in the background. They hear the elevator come up to their floor and head over with their guns to check it out - it's just Sly, who gets totally frazzled out of her wits one more time.

Cliff sets up at a business deal which will net him some quick cash. He bumps into Wendell and tells him that he's going to work his out of Jeremy's pocket. Wendell says he knows that Cliff will continue to make the same mistakes over and over again.

Donna and Senator Dowling attend a function together. Andy wonders why she married Ray when the two of them were so different. Donna tells him the story of their first meeting many years ago [Episode...] and thinks she feels the baby kicking.

Just after dinner, JR finally gets a call from Calhoun. JR says he wants to meet and patch things up, and Calhoun says that when it's time for them to meet, JR will know. Meanwhile, the rest of the family head down the stairs of their California hotel as Calhoun watches from above. Harry's boys are unable to trace the call, so no one is the wiser.

Vacationing Clayton and Ellie end up staying in because she's got a bad cold and won't shut up about it.

John Ross disappears from the hotel poolside and a sunbather tells Sue Ellen that he was last seen talking to a man, who she figured was his father. Sue Ellen immediately calls JR and goes into hysterics. He tells her not to call the police and the boys head out right away.

Meanwhile, Calhoun takes John Ross to a secret location to hide out for a while. The resourceful young boy tries to make a quiet break for it but Calhoun intercepts him and tells him to sit down and stay quiet. He sends up a tape machine to the Ewings' hotel room showing John Ross unharmed, but with a stern warning to follow upcoming instructions. He tells JR to check with the hotel desk for a message indicating where to go - and he says that JR had better be alone, or John Ross won't be alive much longer.

JR and Sue Ellen understandably can't sleep. Before heading out for the confrontation, JR tells Sue Ellen that whatever happens, he wants her to know that he has loved her - and he cares about their son just as much as she does. Calhoun's message is to meet a kids' park, with a whole lot of big model trains, a few miles away. Ray and Bobby want to come with JR for backup but he tells them he can't take the chance that they might be spotted.

JR arrives and almost immediately finds himself being shot at and taunted by the reckless mercenary, who exhorts him to fight. JR responds that he won't shoot while BD has John Ross. BD calls a temporary truce and invites JR to come and have a look at his son. JR does so and finds John Ross bound and gagged in one of the large toy trains. Calhoun declares the truce over and the gunplay resumes, with some oddly uncharacteristic music going in the background. JR runs back and forth amongst the trains in an attempt to get to his son but BD comes up behind him.

Calhoun says he saw the whole episode at the hotel where JR refused his brothers' help and gets on his case again about JR's betrayal which cost him most of his mercenary buddies, following up with a shot to the abdomen. JR pleads with him to let John Ross go so that he won't see his father die but BD says he has a different idea - he wants to let JR watch his son die. Just as he's about to shoot John Ross, Bobby and Ray appear from the shadows and gun the madman down. John Ross is rescued, and JR promises that everything's going to be all right now.

Episode 242: Olio  Aired: Thu, Jan.14

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "The one thing you can depend on is that uncle JR will be OK." - Pam to Christopher.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Jenna. Off the booking sheets completely again.

Things return to normal for the Ewings - sort of. JR's wound turns out be superficial and Bobby and Ray are being held by the police for questioning. John Ross and Christopher get miniature testosterone kicks and re-enact the gunfight. Pam informs Ellie about the situation and asks Clayton to get Scotty Demarest to find them a good lawyer. Bobby, Ray, and Sue Ellen return and Pam learns that they've been released on their own recognizance. Sue Ellen gets upset at Pam for continuing to blame JR for everything.

Cliff learns the news from Jackie and says the world would be better off without JR, but he really would like to get a hold of Pam. Because of Pam's absence, Cliff isn't able to consummate the deal with Bert Pope to get some ready cash, and Bert decides to take his business elsewhere.

The Man in Black visits JR in his hospital room. They argue again about responsibilty over recent events and the Man says that JR owes him a favor because the agency has managed to get all charges dropped in lieu of the circumstances. He warns JR that his files are still considered open - so he had better watch his step is he doesn't want to lose Ewing Oil.

The family returns to Dallas and John Ross and Christopher tell Ellie the whole story with some minor exaggeration. JR has designs on renewing his relationship with Sue Ellen and she says she's open to the possibility if he really means it [groan]. JR tells her he's found new respect and appreciation for her after the way she got rid of Mandy and says he thinks he could fall in love with her all over again. They agree to give their love another try.

Bobby tells JR that if he can't stop his secretive dealing, he'll sell his share of Ewing Oil and so will the rest of the family. JR apologizes for forcing the family to bail him out again and says he'll stay away from the office for a while to recuperate and allow Bobby to make the decisions for a while.

Bert Pogue comes to see Bobby and offers to sell his company for 18 million because he needs the cash. Bobby says he'll have an answer by tomorrow. Bobby and Pam bump into Jeremy Wendell who asks him about the Calhoun affair. Bobby tells him to stuff it and to forget about his designs on Ewing Oil because the family is united against him. Wendell intimates that every family has a weak link, as he says goodbye to Pam.

Donna and Senator Dowling have another one of their boring conversations about how she belongs in Washington and away from Ray and they should make hot, passionate love despite the fact that she's about to give birth [KIDDING about that last point, but you know what I mean]. Clayton and Ellie head to Oklahoma City to buy a rolltop desk. [I'm not kidding about this one.]

Cliff goes ballistic over Pam's absence and wonders whether she's a Barnes or a Ewing. This has the predictable effect of getting Pam upset and having her leave in a huff.

April tells Wendell that she's confirmed JR's interest in Macarthur Mining, to Jeremy's delight. JR tells April she's done a great job and is very glad that he's got a direct line to Jeremy now. April asks him to stay for some innocent conversation but JR says he's redevoted himself to Sue Ellen and she should be content with the fact that she's going to be a very wealthy young woman soon.

Bobby tells the family about finishing the deal with Bert Pogue which makes Pam totally upset that the Barnes-Ewing feud will probably reignite. Pam tells JR she warned Cliff to stay away from Macarthur Mining and a few other companies, which gets JR thinking...

JR heads over to April's place and wonders what kind of relationship Wendell has with Cliff. She tells him about the loan that Cliff got from Jeremy and JR realizes that everyone's playing each other. Yet again, after finding out what he wants to know, JR leaves her all alone - until April gets a call from her mother. She tearfully tells her mother that she's found a lot of new friends and is very happy in her new home.

Sue Ellen brings Ozwald Valentine to the Oil Baron's Club and he's fascinated by Cassie's chest. Ozwald says that their operation in the West Coast has been hampered by Jamie's recent absence for a trip with a friend to Mexico. Sue Ellen comments that Jamie's been going through a rough time. Ozwald mentiones that he thinks he's found a perfect new Valentine girl.

Charlie finds Ray out by his stable to see him without her mother knowing. She asks him why they've been apart for so long and says it's been very tough on Jenna because Ray was her only support. Ray explains that it's very complicated but they have to stay apart a while longer. Charlie comments that Ray doesn't seem like much of a friend.

That night, just before dinner, Sue Ellen gets a call from California that Jamie died because of a tragic accident during a hiking trip.

Episode 243: A Death in the Family  Aired: Fri, Jan.15

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "God bless her." - Cliff about Jamie when he finds out he might get everything she had.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: I'd have to say a tie between Sue Ellen and JR, of all people. Spooky.

Pam comes over to Cliff's place to tell him about Jamie and finds him upset over not having had his Chinese food delivered. Cliff is dumbstruck by the news and starts to feel guilty about not being a better husband and Pam tries to calm him down.

That evening, April is surprised to hear her doorbell ring - it's JR to tell her about Jamie's death. April feels guilty for putting the moves on Cliff and perhaps driving her away. JR tells her that it seems that April will get her share of Ewing Oil after all - now they just have to find Jack.

Ray visits Paul Morgan again and finds that Paul has gotten pictures of Donna and Senator Dowling together. Ray starts to get cold feet at the prospect of attacking Donna but Paul reminds him that this sort of thing is the only way he's going to get custod of his child.

John Ross and Christopher have another mock gunfight in the house and Sue Ellen tells them to take their game outside. Christopher goes upstairs to look for a toy gun, but, failing to find one, decides to take Bobby's revolver out of his closet. He heads back down the stairs to look for John Ross, and after some hide-and-seek, he spots him and takes a shot. Fortunately he's a worse shot than Sue Ellen so he misses and just shatters a screen door. Ellie and Clayton have a "Full House" moment with their grandkids and lecture them about the dangers of guns. 

Bobby is told that Ewing Oil's deal with Macarthur Mining has fallen through because Jeremy Wendell has come up with a better offer. He's offered a chance to match the deal but declines because he doesn't like to be chiseled.

Sue Ellen meets with Ozwald to check out the new Valentine Girl but is totally unimpressed, so she decides to close down the Los Angeles branch of Valentine's.

Pam and Bobby return home and have another Full House moment with their son. Pam predictably gets upset at the presence of guns in the house and tells Bobby that everyone seems to think she's a spy. Bobby pooh-poohs the idea and Pam says that she's going to Los Angeles to help Cliff collect Jamie's stuff.

Ray gets a call from Donna to talk about their upcoming hearing and to catch up on things. They have a fairly meaningless conversation and agree that they've drifted apart too far. The next day he bumps into Jenna and says he'd like to start seeing her and Charlie again because he feels bad about shutting them out. The Krebbs have their preliminary settlement hearing in Paul Morgan's office and each decides to take only what's theirs.

April gets a fur coat from Wendell and asks him about Jack's whereabouts. He counters that he needs to know how long Bobby will be running the company.

In searching through Jamie's stuff, Cliff finds her unsigned will and a postcard from Jack with a phone number. She tries calling him but Jamie's phone has unfortunately been disconnected. The next day, the stuff from Jamie's safety deposit box is examined and Cliff finds that there's not a copy of their divorce agreement with her things. Despite this, he tells Pam he intends to let Jack inherit all of Jamie's things. Cliff goes to see Jamie's friend about the accident and it turns out to be that girl from Wings [no, not Crystal Bernard - the other one]. She rehashes the accident for him and Cliff even often to help her out but she declines. The lady also tells Cliff that whatever happened, Jamie did care about him.

Charlie tells Jenna about getting hooked up with her Krebbs fix and that everything's just fine.

Pam comes home and tells the family about Jamie's will. JR worries about the fact that so many outsiders will get their hands on a piece of Ewing Oil - again. Cliff is told that because of the fact that the divorce was never finalized, and neither was the will, he is legally the sole beneficiary of Jamie's estate.

Episode 244: Revenge of the Nerd  Aired: Tue, Jan.19

NITPICKS for this episode

LINES OF THE DAY:  "We're not even the same species, Barnes!" - JR to Cliff when he suggests they might have more in common than he thinks.

"Anyone else here got a termite for a brother?"
"Just Bobby."
JR and Pam at the breakfast table.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Jenna. What a surprise.

Cliff calls Jamie's lawyer in Los Angeles and finds that Jamie's will was never signed, and she had no other will.

Sue Ellen shows Pam her latest idea - a home video showcasing her lingerie. She suggests that Pam leave the oil business and infighting and join her. Pam declines, saying that Cliff needs her presence and support, despite the presence of the new breathtaking Valentine Girl.

JR and April have another think-tank session to try and figure out where Jack might have ended up. Yet again, after some pleasant conversation, April is left all alone.

Ray talks to Clayton about his upcoming divorce hearing and Clayton tells him he should forget about the idea of getting custody because he wouldn't be able to raise a child on his own. Ray defiantly says that he might lose, but he plans on putting up a hell of a fight. Later he meets with Paul Morgan to go over the case and gets another bout of cold feet over the possibility of mud-slinging. That day, Ellie and Donna have lunch and talk about the upcoming divorce hearing. Ellie wonders if there's any chance of a reconciliation, and Donna replies in the negative.

A gleeful Cliff meets up with JR and Sue Ellen at the Oil Baron's Club and tells them he might have a surprise in store for them soon. He even uncharacteristically offers to buy them a bottle of champagne and JR wonders what the deal is. He asks Pam the next day what she knows, and he gets the expected cold shoulder.

After being refused seating at a restaurant because she's a unaccompanied woman, April brings Chinese take-out over to Cliff's place and says she'd just like to have a quiet dinner with someone. Cliff is instantly suspicious of her motives even after she protests further, and throws her out. April promises that she won't forget it. Cliff comes to Ewing Oil and tells JR that his little 'ruse' with April didn't work and also mentions the details surrounding his inheritance of Jamie's assets including the ten percent of Ewing Oil.

JR comes home and goes house on Pam at the prospect of Cliff getting a piece of Ewing Oil. Pam gets upset that Cliff would try and benefit from Jamie's death after the way he treated her and JR is amazed that she could think of the memory of a dead girl rather than what's important. [Yes, you read that right.] Ellie has her annual tirade against the lack of peace in the household, and says she's considering selling the ranch and dispersing everyone so she doesn't have to deal with it.

Pam confronts Cliff the next day and says she wants to buy his ten percent of Ewing Oil to keep them in Christopher's name so there won't be any more fighting and she can save her marriage. Cliff says he's doing this for Digger's memory, to make up for all of the years that the Barneses were cheated by the Ewings. Bobby confronts Cliff after he finds out about his conversation with Pam. He warns Cliff that business is business but if Pam is hurt any further by his shenanigans...he'll tear him apart. [Not in so many words.] Cliff and his lawyer have a hearing and he is officially declared Jamie's sole heir.

Ray and Donna's divorce hearing dawns and the custody issue is bandied around. Donna says that she's willing to allow Ray any and all visitation rights. Paul Morgan begins to talk about how Ray can offer his child a stable home and an extended family, and as he's about to bring forth pictures of Donna and the Senator, Ray asks him to forget about it. Afterwards, Clayton tells Ray he did the right thing. After spending some time in a bar, Ray returns home to find Jenna and Charlie asleep in his livingroom waiting for him.

JR and April get a private investigator to start looking for Jack - at any cost.

At a CIA facility, the Man in Black brings some records relating to the BD Calhoun scandal to be buried in their files. A clerk mentions that the records could bury Ewing Oil, but the Man says the CIA wouldn't look very good if word got out about them. Another worker named Alfred seems very interested in the conversation.

Episode 245: The Ten Percent Solution  Aired: Wed, Jan.20

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "She doesn't need dialogue, Sometimes she just stands there..." Bruce Harvey about the Academy Award nominee Mandy Winger. [Sorry, Kyle. Couldn't resist. Nominated by Jason.]

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Ray and Jenna. What a surprise.

Jeremy Wendell comes to Barnes-Wentworth to see Cliff and wonders when his 6 million dollars will be repaid. He offers to forego the loan if he agrees to sell him his 10 percent of Ewing Oil. Cliff declines and Jeremy says he's calling in the loan - and if Cliff doesn't come up with the cash, he's going to own one-third of Wentworth Tool and Die. Pam asks him about Jeremy's visit and Cliff says that he refused Wendell's offer to sell, despite the fact that he still owes Pam a half-million dollars. He says he even considered selling Pam his share of Wentworth Tool and Die to make up for it and Pam is shocked that Cliff would even consider selling his share of their mother's legacy.

JR brings April to the Oil Baron's Club and they 'happen' to meet up with a Braddock judge. JR takes the opportunity to explain the circumstances of Jamie's death - and the way she obtained her share of Ewing Oil. The judge says it's very difficult to prove malicious intent on Jack's part by selling his share of the company - and it will be impossible to do it without Jack around to testify.

Back at the CIA facility, the Man in Black comes down to the storage area with one last file to be tossed in the BD Calhoun box.

Ellie berates Clayton for continuing to eat spicy foods. JR asks Bobby whether Pam has revealed anything about Cliff's plans ot insinuate himself into Ewing Oil and Bobby says Pam doesn't know anything about it. JR calls Harry McSween and says he's going to need him to take a trip.

Donna and Senator Dowling talk about her divorce and her future. The Senator reminds her that she's not alone and he'd like to help her in her time of need. Donna says if he really wants to help, he should leave her alone for a while. Later, Donna comes over to the Senator's house and says that she's frightened of the prospect of having another relationship so soon. Dowling says he's willing to take it as slow as she wants, and to start out with just friendship.

Cliff tries to get a fast-track loan by offering a bribe to a banker. He returns to the office to find JR surprisingly waiting for him. JR tells Cliff he wants to declare a truce in their feud and he wants to buy Jamie's share of Ewing Oil. JR fakes a heart attack and asks Cliff to get him a drink to distract him while he picks up some stationery off of his desk.

Sue Ellen takes John Ross shopping for a puppy and they bump into April, who offers them a lunch date but she declines.

Bobby gets a call from a guy who says he knows where Jack Ewing is and is only willing to tell for $ 10,000. He meets the guy in a bar the next day and he's shown a postcard from Jack postmarked from a small Texas town. Bobby says he doesn't figure the information is worth all that much and a barfight ensues. Bobby holds his own and manages to escape.

Ray comes over to Jenna's place to fix her kitchen faucet. Ray asks her to bring Charlie to move in with him so that they can all be part of a real family without any of the strings that normally come with it. Jenna is coyly hesitant about the whole thing.

Cliff calls Marilee Stone over to his place and tries to sweet-talk her into loaning him the money he needs to pay back Wendell. Marilee reminds him of the time in Episode 162 when he said he didn't want her money or her body and leaves in a huff.

As Mary Elizabeth McCall comes out of a Los Angeles store, a guy grabs her purse and quickly dashes off. He hands the purse off to a waiting Harry McSween, who takes the opportunity to make a cast of her house key and plant some things in the purse before dumping it in a mailbox. Harry tells JR the plan went perfectly and JR asks him to fly back quickly and be at Southfork around dinnertime.

Bruce Harvey meets with Sue Ellen about Mandy's film, which Bruce says is going great because of Mandy, who he lauds as having a Marilyn-Monroe type presence about her. [I'm seriously gagging here.]

Mrs. Scottfield [from Episode 226] puts her kids to bed and complains to her brother Alfred [the CIA worker] about the way the Ewings ruined her life by laying her husband off. Alfred tells her the little he knows about the Ewings' involvement with BD Calhoun, but says that all of the evidence has unfortunately been put away in the CIA vault. Mrs. Scottfield says it makes sense because the Ewings seem to be able to get away with anything.

Harry comes to Southfork at dinnertime as planned and tells JR and the family that Jamie's death might not have been an accident - new evidence has surfaced indicating she might have been pushed. Harry says they found $ 25,000 in Mary Elizabeth's apartment - as well as evidence she had been in secret contact with Cliff Barnes for some time. According to Harry, the L.A.P.D. figures Cliff might have paid her to make Jamie's death look like an accident.

Episode 246: Some Good, Some Bad  Aired: Thu, Jan.21

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Compared to you, JR is a saint!" - Pam to Cliff. Nominated by Jason.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Donna. One scene. April too, but hers was more significant.

Cliff is taken in for questioning and denies being involved in Jamie's death. He also says that he did meet Mary Elizabeth but only once, and he never gave her any money.

JR tries to get the judge from yesterday to get an injunction keeping Cliff out of Ewing Oil. The judge says he'll grant a temporary injunction but it won't last long. He also asks for a restraining order keeping Cliff away from the Ewing building.

Jenna and Charlie move in to Ray's house, and Charlie is thrilled at her huge new room. Jenna tells Ray she still has concerns about being so close to Southfork, and Ray tells her she shouldn't have to hide from anybody.

Donna is told by Senator Dowling and others that she's really made a difference with her time in Washington. She finally succeeds in making several Senators support a floor on oil prices.

Pam gets Scotty Demarest to defend Cliff, who still feels he's in big trouble despite the fact that all of the evidence is circumstantial. Scotty plays a game of 'courtroom' in which he makes both of them see that there's a lot of evidence to support the fact that Cliff was only interested in Jamie because of her link with the Ewings and their company. Even Pam is forced to admit that his vendetta against the Ewings is the most important thing in his life.

Cliff confronts JR about framing him up for murder. JR shows him the restraining order he just got and requests that he leaves under his own power.

Wendell comes to Barnes-Wentworth to see Pam, to her surprise. He tells her about the loan he arranged for Cliff, borrowed against his share of Wentworth Tool and Die - and that Cliff is about to default on the loan. He says that Pam can pay him back $ 10 million to hang on to the share, and she agrees to do it.

Bobby is interrupted at lunch by the newly-returned Jack Ewing, who says he's heard about Jamie's accident. However, he needs Bobby to tell him that Cliff seems to be the inheritor of the share of Ewing Oil, to his disgust. Bobby asks him to hang around and help the Ewings out to prevent Cliff from benefiting from Jamie's death, but Jack says he just wants to be left alone.

JR announces his procurement of the injuction and restraining order against Cliff to the family that night and is surprised to hear Pam applaud his efforts. Bobby mentions the meeting with Jack and JR is incredulous that Bobby let him go without finding out where he was staying. JR tells Sue Ellen that he thinks it will be tough to beat Cliff without Jack's help, but Sue Ellen says he'll find a way. JR tells her he'd like her to move back into his bedroom again for good this time and she says she'd like to but she's afraid.

Bobby comes over to Ray's house to clear the air between them. He's surprised to find Charlie and Jenna there and even more surprised to find that they've moved in permanently. Their debate escalates into an argument in which Bobby gets a bit out of line. Ray smacks him and tells him to get out of their house. That night, Jenna tells Ray she thinks she made a mistake moving in with him but he's able to convince her she's wrong.

Alfred and Mrs. Scottfield cabbage the evidence that the CIA has against the Ewings and Alfred mentions that the Justice Department would be very interested if they found out. His sister says she couldn't live with the knowledge that there was a way to give the Ewings their comeuppance and nothing became of it.

Cliff learns that the LAPD has denied any knowledge of his involvement in Jamie's death. He tells Pam about it but she's totally unimpressed and asks him about Jeremy's loan and his willingness to part with his share of their mother's company. Cliff tries to explain but Pam sees through him and says she's leaving Barnes-Wentworth - and him - for good. She returns home to find Bobby with a huge welt on his face from Ray's fist and Bobby is forced to tell him about Jenna's sudden proximity to the ranch. Pam predictably goes into Mrs. Broslofski mode after hearing that news.

Ozwald Valentine tells Sue Ellen he's considering using Velcro in their new line. April happens to stop by their table and Ozwald is predictably smitten and figures she could be very useful in promoting their company but April says she's no model.

Deep in the CIA vault, Alfred takes advantage of an opportunity to get into the vault unnoticed and rather quickly manages to find the Calhoun file. He slips a reel of film into his pocket and manages to get out just in time.

Wendell finds Cliff at the Oil Baron's Club and they argue about his underhanded tactics in getting his loan repaid. Cliff promises to get back at Wendell one day but Jeremy just laughs it off.

JR admits to Bobby that he set up Cliff and Mary Elizabeth and Bobby starts to berate him for it until Jack arrives in his office unexpectedly. Jack says that Bobby convinced him to stick around and fight Cliff so that he doesn't benefit from his sister's untimely death.

Episode 247: War and Peace  Aired: Fri, Jan.22

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Mind the phones...mind your business." Cliff laying the smackdown on Jackie's nosiness.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Ellie and Clayton. One scene each.

Cliff tries to convince Pam he never meant to hurt her and he wants her to stay at Barnes-Wentworth. Pam cabbages all of the things she's done for him this season and says that the only way she could make it up to him is to sell her his share of Ewing Oil, which Cliff says is the one thing he won't do, because revenge on the Ewings means more to him than anything else.

Sue Ellen and Ozwald discuss falling sales since Mandy Winger left Dallas. Ozwald suggests they try to get her back but Sue Ellen figures she wouldn't be interested.

Ellie visits Jenna at her new home to see how she's getting on and says she's upset at hearing the news second-hand. Jenna tries to explain that her relationship with Ray is just friendly and everyone else will just have to accept the new arrangement. Clayton presses Ray for answers but Ray is somewhat evasive about things. Ray does admit that

The Ewing gang meets with Harve in JR's office to discuss strategy. Harve says the 'malicious intent' angle is the best way to proceed, and then after Jack's 1 dollar sale to Jamie is declared null and void, the share of Ewing Oil will be returned to Jack, April will get half, and then both of them will sell their shares back to Ewing Oil. Jack grudgingly agrees to go along with the plan, but complains that the real victim of this tragedy won't benefit at all.

Mrs. Scottfield visits a small newspaper editor with the story about the Ewings' involvement with BD Calhoun. The editor says he's going to need some hard proof of the story before he can print it. He also promises that his sources will be kept completely confidential. Mrs. Scottfield tells Alfred about what she wants to do but he's worried about heading off to jail because of it. She's able to convince him to see what else he can find in the vault.

Sue Ellen asks JR how he would feel if Mandy returned to Dallas. JR says that Mandy's behind him now and he's completely devoted to his wife. Meanwhile, Bobby finds Pam to be totally unresponsive in bed and figures it's because of their battle with Cliff, but she says that what's bothering her is Jenna's continued presence and she can't pictures of Bobby and Jenna out of her mind. Bruce Harvey comes to Sue Ellen's sweet new office to discuss Mandy's future. After some banter, she tells Bruce that she wants Mandy back in Dallas and selling her lingerie again.

Ray comes over to Southfork to see Bobby and bury the hatchet. Bobby tells him about Pam's anxiety over Jenna's presence and Ray tells him that he should stay away from his child's mother, just as he intends to do. That night, Ray and Jenna discuss the fact that they've been brought together despite the family's concerns and Jenna's baby starts kicking. Around the same time in Washington, Donna goes into labor and gives birth to a baby girl. She asks Dave Culver to call Ray but he ends up getting Jenna, to whom Donna tells the news.

The court case against Cliff begins and Jack tells the court his story about selling his share of Ewing Oil to Jamie so that April wouldn't get anything. Cliff gets all bent out of shape over all of the allegations that he didn't love Jamie and he and Jack trade mutual insults. Several people are questioned, including JR and April. The court decides that Jack's sale to Jamie should be set aside, but only as far as April is concerned. Five percent is given to April, but five percent remains with Jamie's estate - and Cliff. Jack grumbles about the ridiculousness of it all.

Mrs. Scottfield watches the press conference afterwards, where JR tells the throng of reporters that justice wasn't served. She promises him that justice will be served very soon.

Episode 248: Ruthless People  Aired: Mon, Jan.25

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "I'll be getting as much as I will be giving." - Mandy to an uneasy Sue Ellen. Nominated by Jason.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Cliff. Not even a bit of dialogue.

Jeremy Wendell visits April and congratulates her on her court victory. JR comes out of a room and tells Wendell he's been had because April has agreed to sell her five percent of Ewing Oil back to him. Wendell says he may have lost the battle but he promises the war's not over yet.

Ray comes to Washington to see Donna and the new baby, who has been named Margaret after Ray's mother. Ray calls Jenna and Charlie to gush about his new daughter, and then meets with Senator Dowling at a restaurant the next day. They discuss his relationship with Donna and come to an understanding about his child.

The next day, Jeremy Wendell picks up the newspaper and reads a small tidbit about an unconfirmed report that the Ewings might have been involved with BD Calhoun's terrorist plot in the Middle East. Harve Smithfield reads the same paper and rushes over to Southfork. Bobby and JR head out to find more information and say they want a lawsuit pressed. Pam tells Bobby that JR should clean up his own mess but Bobby tells her to know her role and shut her mouth. [Good for you, Bob.]

Sue Ellen and Ozwald rehash [for the umpteenth time] the need for Mandy Winger to return. Ozwald presses his case a little more and Sue Ellen seems to have a change of heart.

Bobby and JR confront the Navarro newspaper editor and warn him about his slanderous article. The editor tells them that the CIA has denied everything, so there won't be any more articles, and rants to them about the sorry state of affairs in his town since Ewing Oil decided to cut back operations.

Mrs. Scottfield returns home and joyfully begins to tells Alfred about the newspaper article, only to find that the Man in Black is waiting for her. The Man tells her that the story is now dead because the 'evidence' she procured was false. When Mrs. Scottfield protests, the Man also points out that her brother could end up in Federal prison if she doesn't reconsider her position.

Clayton and Ellie have dinner at the Oil Baron's Club and face some guys at another table who start cracking some jokes at them. Clayton confronts them and they say they're surprised that the Ewings can show their faces around town after some of the allegations that have been made. Rather than face Clayton's wrath, the guys decide to leave. Ellie says that her boys have gone too far this time.

Bobby and JR return home and Pam can't believe that JR got himself off the hook again. Sue Ellen tells JR that she doesn't care what happens to Ewing Oil as long as their relationship can continue the way it has.

Ozwald heads to Los Angeles and finds Mandy doing a photo shoot. He tries to convince her to come back to Dallas for the good of the company, despite the fact that Sue Ellen might not be crazy about the idea. Ozwald reminds her that they took a big chance on her to jump-start her career, so she owes them something. Mandy says she'll see what she can do.

Ellie comes to Ewing Oil and tells JR and Bobby the straight goods about how she feels right now. She does a complete 180 on her sons and says that she can't bring herself to defend her sons any longer. As far as she's concerned, they have no right to own Ewing Oil. When JR reminds her that Jock left the company to them, Ellie lays the smackdown and says that Jock would have been just as disappointed in them as she is right now.

Mandy comes to Sue Ellen's office unexpectedly and tells her about Ozwald's visit. Sue Ellen tries to tell her that Valentine's need for her is not that urgent, but magnanimously agrees to accept her help.

The dinner table is very quite that evening. John Ross notices his father's distraction and they talk privately. JR tells him that he did 'something' for the good of Ewing Oil, but it just didn't work out the way he hoped. John Ross reaffirms that he thinks JR is the best father in the world. Bobby tells Pam that he's sick of all the shenanigans and wants to leave Ewing Oil before the family name is disgraced any further. Cliff watches the news that night and sees JR deny all the allegations.

Jeremy Wendell watches the same newscast and appears pensive. The next day, Wendell comes to Mrs. Scottfield's place and says they have something in common - a hatred for Ewing Oil. He says that he has enough power to protect Alfred and her from the CIA if she agrees to turn over whatever evidence she has left. She pulls a file out of her freezer and shows it to Jeremy, who looks over some of the pictures the CIA took of JR meeting with Calhoun. He comments that Ewing Oil is as good as lost.

Episode 249: The Dark at the End of the Tunnel  Aired: Tue, Jan.26

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY:  "Don't get up."  Cliff to April when she is having a nude massage. Nominated by Jason.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Jenna again.

Bobby gets the accounting and legal departments working double time to find out information about the company's status, which raises Sly's curiosity. That night, he tells JR he wants to leave the company and will allow himself to be bought out. He also mentions that the other family members concur. JR says if that's what the family has become, he's very disappointed. [Editor's note: So am I.] Bobby tells Pam about his decision and says he regrets not being able to hand Ewing Oil down to his son. JR gushes to Sue Ellen about his good fortune and she tells him about Mandy's return to Dallas. JR says he's not the least bit interested in any other woman right now.

Pam visits Barnes-Wentworth and reaffirms her desire to leave the company - and to no longer finance Cliff's projects. Cliff laments the terrible timing of her decision and wonders what he's going to do from now on.

April revisits the restaurant at which she was unceremoniously denied admittance in Episode 244. She tells the snooty maitre d' that she's just bought the place - and tomorrow he'll be reading want ads.

Ray returns home with pictures of Margaret to show to Jenna and Charlie. He tells Jenna that he came to an understanding with Donna and they've agreed to move on with their lives - with new people.

Ozwald dresses up like the Skipper for Mandy's photo shoot, which is a smashing success. Bruce Harvey reminds Sue Ellen that using Mandy in movies would be much more lucrative than what she's doing now.  Sue Ellen asks Bruce to take Mandy to lunch the next day - and be late.

Jeremy Wendell visits a friend in the Justice Department with the evidence he's obtained about JR's involvement with BD Calhoun.

JR tries to apologize to Ellie for all of the strife he's caused but she replies that the break-up of the company is something that should have happened long ago. She tells Clayton she has a feeling that everything's going to be just fine with her family. JR comes to a restaurant to meet Sue Ellen for lunch but finds Mandy there instead. They have a brief chat about recent events and wish each other luck. Mandy says she'd like to talk further and JR says he'll think about it. Sue Ellen watches from a well-hidden table.

Bobby takes Phyllis to lunch to tell her that Ewing Oil is going to be dissolved. Phyllis gets all choked up despite the fact that Bobby says he plans to keep her on the payroll as an executive assistant.

Cliff visits April, who's getting a massage from Larry Hagman's son [really]. He says he wants to bury the hatchet between them and is very impressed when she says she bought her apartment building. He says he allowed Pam to leave Barnes-Wentworth and offers her the chance to provide her with great investment opportunities. April seems nonplussed but says she'll think about it.

The Texas partners of Ewing Oil assemble in JR's office and Harve tells them that at this point, they will be signing an agreement in principle to sell their shares of the company to JR, with the final sale completed in a month's time. Cliff crashes the meeting and says that no matter what happens, he plans to keep his nose in the company, which he proposes should be renamed 'Barnes-Ewing'. JR has to physically restrained from hurting the poor guy. JR tells Bobby he's going to do whatever it takes to get Cliff out of his hair.

Wendell visits April at her restaurant and says he won't forget the fact that she deliberately embarrassed him at her apartment last episode. April reminds him that Cliff still owns five percent of Ewing Oil and she can help him get that share away from him. Wendell says he doesn't think Ewing Oil will be worth much any more.

That night, JR tells Sue Ellen that he'll probably have to spend more time in town and says it's because of the impending sale of the company, but Sue Ellen figures it might be because of Mandy.

While changing Margaret, Donna gets a visit from Senator Dowling, who tells her about the Justice Department's investigation into Ewing Oil, in which JR and perhaps Bobby face jail time. Donna says she can't believe that even JR could do something so preposterous as to warrant that. Donna immediately calls Ellie and tells her the news, causing Ellie to collapse in tears. Clayton immediately heads out in search of JR and starts pounding on him. One of his shots is so devastating that it causes him to fall down the stairs. JR finds that his breathing has stopped.

Episode 250: Two-fifty  Aired: Wed, Jan.27

NITPICKS for this episode

LINES OF THE DAY:  Like there's any question. "I feel as strong as an ox!" - Clayton
"Well, I'm not sure I'd like being married to an ox." - Ellie.

Now, I'd like to ask all you people who got mad at me for calling Clayton an ox: WHO'S YOUR DADDY NOW? [Just kidding. But you see my point.]

Honorable mention for understatement: "Bobby, I know I've made things tough for you." - Pam.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: Donna again.

Clayton is taken to Braddock Emergency despite his protests that he's fine. Ellie tells JR about Donna's phone call and JR starts to get defensive until Ellie hushes him up.

April visits Cliff's office and apologizes for letting her money get to her head. She decides to take him up on his offer of investment, despite their mutual confirmation of distrust.

JR starts calling Texas Congressmen and reminding them about his large campaign contributions that don't seem to be accomplishing much. He insists on getting hooked up with movers and shakers to nip the investigation in the bud. Ray comes over after talking to Donna and accuses JR of lying to everyone about his involvement with BD Calhoun. JR tries to convince him to band together with Bobby and himself but Ray says he doesn't mind losing his share of Ewing Oil if JR gets his comeuppance.

JR makes a phone call to someone and insists on meeting immediately because the person "is the only one he can talk to". Sue Ellen overhears the call and figures it might be Mandy. Actually, JR goes to meet the Man in Black [actually, brown today]. JR accuses him of reneging on their deal. JR reminds him of the CIA's implication in the matter but the Man says they'll live down the temporary embarrassment. JR asks him to buy whoever he needs to but the Man says it's in the hands of the Justice Department now.

To confirm Sue Ellen's worst fears, Mandy shows up very late for a photo shoot and claims she just overslept. She is very apologetic and tells Sue Ellen that she plans to stay in Dallas as long as it takes to repay her back. Later, Buffy comes to Mandy's apartment with more movie scripts but Mandy says she's not as interested in her career as she used to be - she's more interested in getting a certain someone who Sue Ellen knows very well.

Clayton tells the family he feels much better and says he wants to lead a more active lifestyle. After the family leaves, the doctor tells him that he really needs to stay in the hospital and take care of his real problem but Clayton says that he doesn't want to be treated like an invalid.

Pam comes over to visit Cliff and tells him about the pending investigation into Ewing Oil and tells him to get out while he can. Cliff says he just can't let go and curses his dumb luck.

Harve tells JR that the family's sale of Ewing Oil will be stalled because he'll never be able to obtain financing with all of the turmoil that will be surrounding the company soon. JR decides to take Bobby to Washington to stem the tide. He calls in his markers with the Texas Congressmen who are beholden to him and insists on getting in touch with someone at the Justice Department. Bobby meets with Senator Dowling to see if a plea-bargain can be made with Justice and the Senator agrees to look into it.

Jeremy bumps into April at the Oil Baron's Club and she reiterates her wish to help him get Cliff's share of Ewing Oil away from him but he says he's not the least bit interested in any part of Ewing Oil right now.

JR has a "Deep Throat" parking-lot interlude with a guy who claims to be involved with the Justice Department. JR offers to make it worth his while if some of the evidence against Ewing Oil were to disappear. The guy says he might be visiting Dallas soon and will be in touch.

Bobby returns to Dallas and comes by Ray's house to drop off some pictures of Margaret and finds Jenna there. They talk for a bit and as Bobby turns to leave, he hears Jenna going into labor. [Tell me you didn't see that coming.] He's forced to take Jenna to the hospital and calls a disturbed Pam, who he asks to bring Ray and Charlie down to see Jenna. Once there, Pam tells Bobby she's come to terms with his relationship with Jenna and understands that Christopher is the most important person in his life. The troop is informed that Jenna has given birth to a baby boy.

Jeremy visits Mrs. Scottfield again and says he wants Alfred to testify against the Ewings to bring them down for good. Alfred says it would be the end of his career but Wendell promises that he and his sister will be well taken care of.

Mandy visits JR at his office and says she's upset that he didn't call her. JR says it's because of all the trouble Ewing Oil is going through right now. They talk about old times and JR is very fidgety in trying to resist her advances. Mandy plainly tells him that she still loves him as Sly bursts in to tell JR that all of the goods and chattels of Ewing Oil are being removed. JR is told that the Justice Department is shutting the company down pending the outcome of their investigation. A reporter snaps a picture of a very surprised JR and Mandy.

Episode 251: Fall of the House of Ewing  Aired: Thu, Jan.28

NITPICKS for this episode

LINE OF THE DAY: "John Ross...THIS is Ewing Oil." - JR to John Ross, indicating Jock's portrait. This is a true mark-out moment. Shame on you if you did not salute the portrait coming down. I did.

Rating [out of 10]:

The Lucy Award: April is MIA.

The family convenes in the livingroom as JR returns and tells them that Ewing Oil's operations have been shut down. Tensions run high as JR again lambasts the family for abandoning him at his time of need.

Jenna names her baby Lucas after her father and Ray visits her at the hospital. Jenna wonders whether Ray really wants to go ahead with their relationship given the new addition to her life. He says that he'll learn to live the fact that Lucas is not his child but wants to be a part of his upbringing.

Sue Ellen gets upset at JR after seeing his picture in the paper with Mandy. JR says he's finished with Mandy and has much more important things to deal with right now. JR heads to the office and gets a call from "Deep Throat" to set up a meeting.

Mandy tells Bruce Harvey that she doesn't want to leave Dallas right now, despite the great opportunities at her disposal. Bruce says that Sue Ellen is amenable to her departure and Mandy reveals that she's after JR and she intends to teach Sue Ellen a lesson.

Cliff gets a visit from an overjoyed Pam, who says she's learned that she may be able to carry a child to term with new advances in reproductive technology.

Senator Dowling visits Donna and says his efforts with the Justice Department were useless - the prosecution will continue. He says he might be able to convince certain people to accept a deal, though.

A dolled-up Mrs. Scottfield visits Ewing Oil and finds Bobby there. He remembers her after a little goading and she starts ripping into him about the hurt he's done to the little man. She tells him that she was the one who started the avalanche that buried the Ewings - with a little help from a very powerful person.

JR meets "Deep Throat" as planned and they start to talk about the investigation. JR suddenly notices something odd in one of the emergency sprinklers and realizes that the whole thing is a setup. He self-righteously walks out, saying he's an honest American who would never resort to bribery. The upset agent is calmed by being informed that the case against JR is strong enough already.

Christopher comes into his parents' room and asks Pam about his being adopted - apparently he overheard Ellie and her dumb ox of a husband talking about it. Pam and Bobby comfort him about it and do their best to explain their reasons for not telling him before and do the reassurance thing.

Clayton continues to push himself in the exercise room, which he claims is according to doctor's orders, and gets totally horny on seeing his wife enter the room. [This is somewhat disturbing.] Ellie visits the doctor who says that he told Clayton to exercise in moderation and relax because of his heart attack ten years ago. The doctor also says that Clayton has a minor blockage in his heart that needs to be taken care of at some point.

Mandy visits Sue Ellen and reaffirms her desire to remain in Dallas and help her out. Sue Ellen tears up her contract and tells her she knows that Mandy is after JR. They get into a great argument over who needs who more, and Sue Ellen says she'll get along fine without her. She also says that she's realized that it's Mandy who needs JR, not the other way around. Mandy says she'll be back.

Harve, Bobby, and JR meet with Justice Department officials and are told that the Department wants to avoid a costly trial, with the prospect of jail time for JR and Bobby. The Justice Department guy says they'll accept as penalty one-third of the company's current worth and the divestiture of all assets, including the Ewing building. He also says the name of Ewing Oil must be permanently retired - and he needs a decision now.

JR brings John Ross to the office to see the final moments of Ewing Oil and says that even though the building and the company are gone, the tradition of Ewing Oil will live on in their hearts and minds. Jeremy Wendell arrives and reveals to JR that he's the one who purchased the Ewing building - and set the Justice Department in motion against him. JR promises to get back at him if it takes the rest of his life. Wendell retorts that he wants JR out of his offices, along with Jock's portrait which he terms an 'eyesore'. JR lays the smackdown on him and tells him to get the hell away from the portrait, which he solemnly takes down, giving John Ross the Line of the Day.

On her way back from the doctor, Pam is harassed by some white trash in a jeep and swerves away from oncoming traffic, cutting them off. She calls Bobby on her cell phone and says that the doctor told her that she's now able to carry a baby to term. Just as she hangs up, a gas truck appears in front of the car and she is unable to stop. The car is wracked by a fiery crash.